Quotes from Andrew Christensen

We may feel like victims but wonder if we are possibly coconspirators. At the very least, we selected a partner with these faults. Might we have also permitted these faults or even fostered them?

Submission comes from a position of weakness, acceptance from a position of strength.

One can easily imagine a talker and a withdrawer in a relationship facing a joint stress and dealing with that stress in very different ways that intensify their differences. Talkers want to share their concerns with their intimate partners, intensifying the withdrawer's need for time alone.