Quotes from Joe Moore

It's practically impossible to look at a penguin and feel angry.

A simple fact that is hard to learn is that the time to save money is when you have some.

A politician is a person who thinks twice before he says nothing.

After a person makes his mark in the world, a lot of people will come around with erasers.

America Where a man can say what he thinks, if he isn't afraid of his wife, his boss, his customer, his neighbors, or the government.

Appetizers are the little things you keep eating until you lose your appetite.

As a nation we are dedicated to keeping physically fit and parking as close to the stadium as possible.

Before borrowing money from a friend it's best to decide which you need most.

Childhood is that wonderful time when all you need to do to lose weight is take a bath.

Horse sense is what keeps horses from betting on people.

Marriage is like a dollar bill. You cannot spend half of it when you tear it in two. The value of one half depends upon the other.

Marriage love, honor, and negotiate.

Money is a strange thing. It ranks with love as our greatest source of joy, and with death as our greatest source of anxiety.

Only grown-ups have difficulty with childproof bottles.

The mind is a wonderful thing. It starts working the minute you're born, and doesn't stop until you get up to speak in public.

There are no answers, only cross-references.

There are still some honest people left in the world, but they never seem to find anything you lose.

You can always get the truth from a politician after he has turned seventy, or given up all hope of the Presidency.

You can't trust a promise someone makes while they're drunk, in love, hungry, or running for office.

Before borrowing money from a friend it's best to decide which you need most.

If you want to know what God thinks of money, look at the people He gives it to.

A simple fact that is hard to learn is that the time to save money is when you have some.

Our laws are a reflection of our culture. Our culture does not condone the torture of innocent and defenseless creatures. And we as a society believe all God's creatures should be treated humanely.

You can't trust a promise someone makes while they're drunk, in love, hungry, or running for office.