Quotes from Ben Aaronovitch

Which meant I spent my spare time learning theory, studying dead languages and reading books like Essays on The Metaphysical by John "never saw a polysyllabic word he didn't like" Cartwright.

In the 1960s the planning department of the London County Council, whose unofficial motto was Finishing What the Luftwaffe Started, decided that what London really needed was a series of orbital motorways driven through its heart.

The Magic Circle by John William Waterhouse [...] stuck in my mind because of the subject's flagrant health and safety violation. As any competent practitioner will tell you, you always complete your protective circle *before* you start your workings.

She had the startled-rabbit look that civilians get after five minutes of helping the police with their inquiries. If they stay calm for too long it's a sign that they're professional villains or foreign or just plain stupid. All of which can get you locked up if you're not careful. If you find yourself talking to the police, my advice is to stay calm but look guilty; it's your safest bet.

The problem with troubleshooting is that trouble shoots back.

You never said you used to play Dungeon and Dragons," Lesley had said when I explained my reasoning. I'd been tempted to tell her that I was thirteen at the time, and anyway it was Call of Cthulhu, but I've learned from bitter experience that such remarks generally only make things worse.

Peter Grant,' I said. 'Recent arrival, slacker and man of very little fame.

Carnivorous unicorns, I thought.

For a certain generation of African immigrants cleaning offices became part of the culture like male circumcision and supporting Arsenal.

That's because they don't know,' said Tyburn. 'It's like economics. Everybody's got a theory, and some people make it their religion.

Urban Outfitters, eh," said Beverley. "That explains the Dr Denim shirt." "My mum bought me that," I said. "And you think that's less embarrassing?

What are my options?" she asked as I climbed into the driver's seat. "Meaningless euphemisms at one end and your full-on Unseen University at the other," I said. "The Unseen University is a bit like Hogwart's—" Stephanopoulos cut me off. "I have read some Terry Pratchett," she said.

Something round and dirty and white was resting near my foot. It was a skull. I picked it up. 'Is that you, Nicholas?' I asked. 'Put that down, Peter,' said Nightingale. 'You don't know where it's been.

everyone assumes causation when they should be thinking coincidence, and correlation when they should be asking whether Twitter is really a reliable source of information.

CO19, the Met's firearms unit, whose unofficial motto is, "Guns don't kill people, we kill people with guns.

He was transparent, the way holograms in films are transparent.Three dimensional, definitely really there and fucking...transparent.

The designer had probably been going for Turkish Bath but had hit Czech Porn Shoot instead.

The principal advantages of living in your station's section house is that it is cheap, close to work and it's not your parents' flat. The disadvantages are that you're sharing your accommodation with people too weakly socialised to live with normal human beings, and who habitually wear heavy boots. The weak socialisation makes opening the fridge an exciting adventure in microbiology, and the boots mean that every shift change sounds like an avalanche.

The white boys knew they had my attention now, but hesitated -- that's the trouble with being a racist in the white heartlands, you don't get a lot of practical experience.

The evening was still warm enough for shirtsleeves, and the city was clinging to summer like a wannabe trophy wife to a promising center forward.

It's strictly constables, sergeants, and lunatics. We'll keep the kettle on for you.

Whatever was in the sandwiches, you didn't want them getting too warm and going off, or starting to smell, or spontaneously mutating into a new life form.

A romantic," said Nightingale much, much later. "The most dangerous people on Earth.

A)ny working hypothesis was probably going to involve quantum theory at some point—the part of physics that made my brains trickle out of my ears.