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Quotes from Andy Griffiths

Don't mention it," I say. "That's what friends are for. Come on! To the flying fried-egg car!
~ Andy Griffiths
a screaming caterpillar that just screams and screams and when you ask it to stop it just keeps screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and screaming and scream—
~ Andy Griffiths
Okay," I said, "then I'm sorry to inform you that I'm going to have to whack you over the head with this giant banana." "Not if I can whack you first!" said Terry, snatching the banana from my hands and whacking me over the head with it. That's when everything went black.
~ Andy Griffiths
FRED THE GHOSTLY GHOST
~ Andy Griffiths
ALL HAIL THE NEW ORDER!' chanted the crowd. It was a truly grotesque sight.
~ Andy Griffiths
Mount Everest!
~ Andy Griffiths
BARKY THE BARKING DOG SHOW
~ Andy Griffiths
Boris eats a whole couch. 'Ah,' he says, licking his lips, 'just like the couches Mother used to bake!
~ Andy Griffiths
blasted filing monster,' says One-eyed Pete.
~ Andy Griffiths
Take a look at this." "Those poor little ants," says Jill.
~ Andy Griffiths
bravo, bravo!' says Terry. 'That was il magnifico de stupendio!' 'Thank you,' says Mr Big Nose, taking a big bow.
~ Andy Griffiths
Our books are friends for life.
~ Andy Griffiths
dance contest …
~ Andy Griffiths
Girl germs. (Shocking fact #1: Girl germs have been scientifically proven—by me and my best friend, Danny—to be the most dangerous germs on the planet. Anybody who has ever TOUCHED a girl, been in the SAME ROOM as a girl or even THOUGHT about a girl should immediately run to the nearest hospital before it is too late. Anybody who IS a girl, well, bad luck. It already IS too late. You are doomed.)
~ Andy Griffiths
Boy germs. Actually, no. That's just a joke. (Shocking fact #2: Not only are boy germs completely harmless, they have been scientifically proven—by me and my best friend, Danny—to be GOOD for you.)
~ Andy Griffiths
I turn it off. I try to relax. I take a deep breath. But I can't get that scene out of my mind where that poor kid who is sitting up late all by himself watching a horror movie suddenly has a group of blood-sucking axe-wielding freaks
~ Andy Griffiths
You're going to come with
~ Andy Griffiths