Quotes from Stuart Maconie

I have no desire to eat it beneath pictures of the proprietor sulking in a bandana, which is why I tend to avoid Marco Pierre White's places. I agree with the singer Paul Heaton, who remarked recently, 'women have been cooking for a thousand years and no one ever mentioned it. Men have been cooking for ten minutes and they never stop bloody going on about it'.

What was so terrible about properly funded hospitals, student grants, decent working conditions, affordable houses, trains that ran for convenience not profit, water that poured from the tap whose function was to slake your thirst not to make shareholders a dividend. What exactly was so wicked about public libraries, free eye tests and council houses? We may be coming to realise that the people who complain about the nanny state are the people who had nannies.

If you're an alien, how come you sound like you come from the north?' 'Lots of planets have a north.' Doctor Who, 2005

Having defeated global fascism, a ruined country rebuilt itself from rubble thanks to the most progressive government in our history and the talents of its children, kids raised by and large outside of the establishment and the elite on a diet of orange juice, free school milk, NHS specs, Watch with Mother, public libraries, art schools, galleries and all the other benefits of a forward-looking state and a commitment to the public good not the private profit.

All right-thinking people respect and love the Beatles. Never trust anyone who doesn't.