Quotes from Foster W. Cline

Parents who give a lot of warnings raise kids who don't behave until they've had a lot of warnings.

If we never let our kids struggle to get something they want or work through a problem for themselves, then when things get difficult later in life, they won't suddenly turn tough and get going; instead, they'll just quit.

It is horribly disappointing to watch kids learn to blame others for their lack of success instead of becoming people who reach goals through effort and determination

If children were meant to run the home, they would have been born larger.

Although kids are born with great courage to take control of their own lives and make decisions, they have little experience on which to base their decisions, so they often make poor choices. But they can learn from those mistakes, provided parents don't get too involved.

Train children in the right way,              and when old, they will not stray. (Proverbs 22:6)

Effective parenting centers around love: love that is not permissive, love that doesn't tolerate disrespect, but also love that is powerful enough to allow kids to make mistakes and permit them to live with the consequences of those mistakes.

parents who build on their kids' strengths find their children growing in responsibility almost daily.

The teenagers who make the wrong choice on alcohol are probably the same children who never learned how to keep their hands out of the cookie jar.

Think of how we, as adults, respond to a person who builds on our strengths. If somebody very important to us thinks we're the greatest thing since remote controls, we will perform like gangbusters for that person. But if that important person thinks we're the scum of the earth, we will probably never prove him or her wrong.

Drill sergeant kids, who did a lot of saluting when they were young, will do a lot of saluting when teenagers, but the salute is different: a raised fist or a crude gesture involving the middle finger.

and spending so little time with their kids. Rather than holding their children accountable for their actions, they simply let them run free, believing that "quality" time will make up for the lack of "quantity" of time they spend with their children and that responsibility will eventually rub off on the children during the right "quality" moments.

Teens often resent guidelines and rebel at firm limits because they've grown to think differently than when they were younger.

Responsible behavior has a direct correlation to the number of decisions children are expected to make. The more they make, the more responsible they become.

Throughout life, the happiest of people rely on internal controls and self-discipline. The unhappiest of people must rely on external controls to keep their behavior in check. No

Be sure to use the bathroom before we leave." Each of these messages tells children they are not capable of thinking for themselves, that they cannot take control of their life and make decisions. Interestingly, such messages often come from parents who moan and groan about their kids' lack of responsibility and ability to think for themselves.

If there's more than a 20 percent chance our child might be able to work it out, we should keep clear of owning the problem and not rob our child of the opportunity to learn and grow from the experience.

Train children in the right way, and when old, they will not stray. Proverbs 22:6

We must understand that making good choices is like any other activity: It has to be learned.

When we think of the enormous love we pump into our children's lives and then the sassy, disobedient, unappreciative behavior we receive in return, we can get pretty burned out on the whole process.