Quotes from Caren Lissner

Being lonely isn't about wanting to be with other people—it's about wanting to be with people who really care about you.

You know," Hallie said, "they make all these antidepressants. They should make a pill that stops you from loving the people you can't have, and makes you attracted to those you can.

We just have to accept that people are going to stay in our hearts, even when they don't stay in our lives.

The most amazing discovery in the world is someone who understands what you're about without your having to go through your entire life history to explain it.

As I get close to the subway, a guy in a raincoat seethes at me, "Smile!" This makes me feel worse. I was lost in thought, minding my own business, and someone felt he had the right to disturb me anyway. Doesn't he realize that by making me feel like I was doing something wrong, he only made me feel less like smiling? It actually had the reverse effect he intended. It's like striking a bawling kid to stop him from crying, and we've all seen that done.

It was too hard to fall in love with someone, learn all of their quirks and passions, assume you'd spend the rest of your life with them, and then suddenly have them snatched away forever.

There are a great many things I would do a study on if I had the time, materials and funding. It bothers me that I can't. I wonder if others are irked by this, this incessant drive to plumb a million things and the inability to delve adequately into any one of them.

But when ninety-five percent of out-of-bed activities hold the possibility of pain, to be pain-free is simply the most delicious feeling in the world.

Being smart doesn't mean being skilled at social interaction. No one ever said being a genius was easy.

There was all the time in the world now – plenty of time for self-analysis, for self-doubts, for regrets. Being part of a couple meant you fit somewhere, that your cracks and erosions were hidden to the rest of the world. When you suddenly had that ripped apart, the hidden blemishes were exposed like cross-sections of a log.

I think that when people get lonely, they try to find someone to blame. But there isn't really anyone to blame. It just takes a long time to find the right person.

Maybe we should all decide we're going to meet the man of our dreams when we're thirty-seven. Then we'll stop squeezing into tight shirts and walking around half-naked and analysing every encounter as future husband material. We'll stop feeling the need to put on makeup to take out the trash just in case he's walking by. Maybe we should just assume that we'll meet our dream man at some future point, and stop driving ourselves crazy before then.

I can spot an underemployed lazy intellectual anywhere.

The true test of a relationship, Gert thought, is if you can tell someone the most boring story in the world about yourself, and they'll still have something to add.

So there's a spiral death trap of dating. When you're with someone, you look happy and relaxed, and thus, a lot more people than you need are attracted to you. When you're sulky and alone, no one is attracted to you, and thus, you stay sulky and alone.

When I was nineteen and I didn't have a boyfriend, I never felt bad about it. Because I figured someday I would. My friends and I had plenty of fun alone. What ruins the fun is the fear that you'll be that way forever.