Quotes from Bruce Fisher

Most folks think they married because they "fell in love." There's an argument to be made that "falling" in love is actually an unstable condition -- maybe even an emotional illness! Oftentimes it has to do with the way the partners are unbalanced, rather than having anything to do with love. Some of us marry our disowned or disused personality parts and call it "falling in love.

We see many people loving with an immature love: Love equals doing something to somebody or for somebody; Love equals taking care of someone; Love equals achieving; Love equals always being in control; Love equals 'never having to say you're sorry;' Love equals always being strong; Love equals being nice.

There is no return on an investment in the relationship's emotional corpse. The greatest possible return comes from investment in yourself.

Many people marry for the wrong reasons, among them 1) To overcome loneliness. 2) To escape an unhappy parental home. 3) Because they think that everyone is expected to marry. 4) Because only 'losers' who can't find someone to marry stay single. 5) Out of a need to parent, or be parented by another person. 6) Because they got pregnant. 7) Because 'we fell in love,' ...and on goes the list.