Quotes from Geoff Tibballs

WHO THE HELL'S AT THE DOOR? When you are young your favourite time for sex are often first thing in the morning or last thing at night,but as you get older your body clock changes.You can't function in the morning until you have had breakfast and at night you are so tired at the end of a long day that you just want to go to sleep.On your agenda,sex comes somewhere below running a marathon or wrestling an alligator.

Forget about being world famous, it's hard enough just getting the automatic doors at the supermarket to acknowledge your existence.

What's the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws, and one is a pause at the end of a clause.

Sorry, but you're mistaking me for someone who gives a damn.

wash our clothes by beating them with our heads.

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family