Quotes from Will Rogers (1879–1935)

A man can fool you with his mind, and his Soul and his Heart, but if you follow his feet you will pretty near find out where he is going.

Great artists say that the most beautiful thing in the world is a baby. Well, the next is an old lady, for every wrinkle is a picture.

...the University of Arizona, a very fine school, well liked and spoken of by everybody that knows about it.

Nobody wants his cause near as bad as he wants to talk about his cause.

Big business don't go broke any more. The minute it looks bad for them, they combine with something else and issue more stock.

What all of us know put together don't mean anything. Nothing don't mean anything. We are here for a spell and pass on. Anyone who thinks that civilization has advanced is an egotist.

This thing of being a hero, about the main thing to do is to know when to die. Prolonged life has ruined more men than it ever made.

If I was a President and wanted something I would claim I didn't want it. Congress has not given any President anything he wanted in the last 10 years. Be against anything and then he is sure to get it.

Confucius perspired out more knowledge than the U.S. Senate has vocalized out in the last 50 years.

The Ways and Means Committee is supposed to find ways to divide up the means.

People are marvelous in their generosity if they just know the cause is there.

History ain't what it is. It's what some writer wanted it to be.

All we hear is "What's the matter with the country?" "What's the matter with the world?" There ain't but one thing wrong with every one of us in the world, and that's selfishness.

When in doubt, tell a funny 'til you see what the other fellow is going to do.

There is one rule that works in every calamity. Be it pestilence, war or famine, the rich get richer and poor get poorer. The poor even help arrange it.

This country has gotten where it is in spite of politics, not by the aid of it.

A statesman is a man that can do what the politician would like to do but can't because he is afraid of not being elected.

The United States Senate opens with a prayer and closes with an investigation.

Theories are great, they sound great, but the minute you are asked to prove one in actual life, why the thing blows up.

You are going to need sales taxes, both Federal and State, income tax, and a lot of other kinds. It's a great country but you can't live in it for nothing.

The crime of taxation is not in the taking of it, it's in the way that it's spent.

In schools they have what they call intelligence tests. Well if nations held 'em I don't believe we would be what you would call a favorite to win it.

There has been war since the beginning of time and we are no smarter than the people that have gone before us. There is apt to be some more war.

I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this — no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.