Quotes from Christopher Buckley

I once spoke to 9,000 people, but they managed to fit them all into a structure that resembled a Zeppelin hangar, so it was a contained space in which whatever laughter I generated could ricochet and hang around for a bit, encouraging others to join in.

Lobbyists didn't descend from a spaceship. They evolved organically from the way we do business.

With real estate, it's location, location, location. In public speaking, it's acoustics, acoustics, acoustics.

We live - on a spinning planet in a world of spin.

I'm a Republican, but I find Nancy Pelosi very attractive.

Give me smart, young, and angry and I'll move the world.

Come on, Terry. Forgotten what it's like to be young and angry?" Terry shrugged. "I'm middle-aged and angry. With good Scotch, I can deal with the anger.

So we've gone from 'Don't trust anyone over thirty' to 'Don't drink any Scotch under thirty'? Is this what's become of your revolution?

No one likes lawyers until you need one, at which point they assume the raiment of knights.

But why would I give my watch, my precious watch and fob, to a—Russian who-re?" "Two Russian who-res. Perhaps to avoid being beaten to death by two very large Russian pimps.

The corporal's morale is excellent verging on sublime, sir.

One advantage to being overweight is that it enhances stomping.

The corporal was not having sex with the congressman in a minefield.

Necessity is the mother of bipartisanship.

The ideological distance between Jim Webb and Bertrand Russell can be measured in light years. An author who reaches both of them exerts something like universal appeal.

Mum's serial misbehavior over the years had driven me, despairing, to write her scolding - occasionally scalding letters.

I remember standing in the crow's nest as we entered the misty Panama Canal, and the strange sensation as the 4,000-ton ship rose higher and higher inside the lock.

I was an only child who had every advantage, every blessing, absolutely.

That's the beauty of argument, if you argue correctly, you're never wrong.

How many times had those awful words - "I know what I'm doing" - been uttered throughout history as prelude to disaster?

Oil they would buy from anyone. From Satan.

Women might just have something to contribute to civilization other than their vaginas".

Nothing raises the national temperature more than a VACANCY sign hanging from the colonnaded front of the Supreme Court.

You never remember who came to the funeral, but you never forget who didn't.