Quotes from Tig Notaro

I knew there was no Santa when I was, like, 5.

It's almost embarrassing how much support I have. I mean, I always tell people I feel like I'm perfectly set up to have cancer. I have great health insurance, I have a savings account. I have work lined up. I have friends and family. I have the best doctors I can get.

When you first start out in stand-up and, probably, as any performer, you enjoy the attention so much, and even though that hasn't died down on stage, it certainly has satiated whatever was in me that was needing that much attention. When I'm off stage, it's not something that I really need.

My mother was so stylish, but she never pushed that on me. She always thought I looked cool.

I was really into music. I started playing guitar also when I was nine. I wanted to be in the Beatles, even though John Lennon died the year I got a guitar and the Beatles broke up before I was born.

When anything huge happens to me, I always think, this isn't my moment, this is a moment.

I'm fascinated by caddy Buddhists popping up all over Hollywood and people that take themselves too seriously.

I feel like I am the most hopeful person you could possibly meet.

People ask what my influences are, and for me, it's not always obvious. One of my biggest inspirations was Chrissie Hynde from the Pretenders. That's based on how she just does whatever she wants to do, and I love her attitude about everything. It bleeds over into my way of thinking and comedy.

I just absolutely adore Denver and the Boulder area. Having lived there several times, it feels like home to me.

I don't ever assume that people are going to love or appreciate what I do. It would be great. I don't assume that they're not going to. I just am like, 'I'm going to do my absolute best at everything I do, and I'm going to put it out with pride and hope people enjoy it.'

I don't personally feel like I've dealt with any sort of discrimination or sexism. I'm not doubting that there might have been that going on and I just didn't read it that way.

When I've had to edit my albums, I'll listen to it one time through, and I'll make edits. I want to remember to set up a camera to record myself listening to my set, because I don't even slightly crack a smile, I am just listening for technical details, and I look like somebody that has absolutely no sense of humor. I look insane.

I didn't like to stop playing for a second to bother with eating or going to the bathroom. I was a really skinny kid, and I remember my mother always telling people, 'I don't know how she's alive. I think she gets all of her nutrients from air pollution.'

Life can very genuinely and realistically pile things on. It doesn't dole out the heartache and pain, or joy, perfectly.

A lot of times, people will have after-parties or try and host an event for comedians, and they misunderstand us. They think it should be wild and crazy, or loud music, and comedians are typically pretty mellow people that just want to talk to each other.

Comedy was a secret want, but it wasn't anything I pursued.

I'm always going to do whatever I think is funniest. If something's dark, I'll do it.

It was a free-for-all with music when I was growing up. My mother was a huge music fanatic so I was listening to everything from country to heavy metal to Indigo Girls to Elton John. I guess when I was really young I didn't like Willie Nelson, and she obviously loved him. Now I do too, I'm so thankful to her for playing his music nonstop.

My mom was a freethinking artist - she was wild and would do anything to get a laugh from me. She'd go in reverse through a drive-through so I could order from the window: 'Hi, can I get a milk shake?'

You can think you're living in the moment and you're thankful, but when somebody comes face to face with you and says, 'I just lost my child,' or 'I have months to live, and thank you...' I'm of course sad for them, but I'm thankful that I gave them a gift and they're giving me a gift.

Luckily, I'm not a gambler or a drinker or - you know, I get my fix of comedy.

I can't imagine just dusting my pants off and going about my life like, "Phew! I sure made it through a tough spot, now where am I headed?" I feel more of an obligation to be helpful.

Maybe almost 20 years ago, I was like, 'God, I need to be more direct.' And I found times that I could practice it when it was maybe not my family or friends or co-workers. It's a quality that's rarely disliked.