Quotes from Bill Hader

I set the time on my iPhone to be 30 minutes late, so I'm only an hour and a half late to appointments now.

My life is different since I moved back to L.A. from New York, mostly because I have a family and I don't go out.

I remember being unbelievable bummed when 'Freaks and Geeks' was canceled.

Good directors give short and specific instructions to their actors.

Seth Meyers and I wrote a 'Spider-Man' comic.

I collect movies. So I have all those in binders. I don't have the DVDs out. I put them in binders.

My wife is the sweetest, most even-keeled person ever. A mood swing to her is like, 'Oh, I'm uncomfortable.'

In Tulsa, it was sports or nothing.

Oddly enough, I have really bad stage fright - getting up in front of people. And I made a living going on live television.

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!'

I grew up with my two sisters and my mom, so it's my lot in life to be surrounded by women.

I love comedy, but it's dramas that stick with me.

If you watch 'SNL,' any time there's this thing with everyone singing, I'm, like, the one person who just has a straight line of dialogue because I can't sing to save my life.

I would do 'Superbad,' and the next offers you would get would all be crazy cop characters or crazy security guards or something.

I'm the only one in Tulsa, Oklahoma, that has Final Draft on my computer. Then you show up and go to any coffee shop in L.A., and there are a hundred people your age with Final Draft.

My wife and I got to go onstage at a Flaming Lips concert at Webster Hall once. We dressed up like Scientology aliens and danced around. We had a shootout onstage with Santa Claus.

Comedy is this weird thing. You have no idea why certain things work and other things don't work.

I get migraines a lot. I get them when I'm stressed out. My brain freezes, and I just try to get through that.

One of the reasons I started working at 'South Park,' actually, was that I wanted to learn how to structure things and how to tell a story.

I've seen people who come to work say, 'No, I'm doing it this way, and that's that.' I'm the opposite - I like being out of my element; it's where I like to live.

Las Vegas, New Mexico has had a lot of great movies shot there.

For our anniversary, my wife and I went to see Godzilla, and then we ate at Barnyard Venice, and it was like, 'We are crazy! The Kardashians have to keep up with us!'

I started 'SNL,' and I became the one who did impressions. I did that, but then I wanted to get an original character on, and that took a long time to get one on that stuck. And then I got Vinny Vedecci on - 'Oh great' - and then it took a couple more seasons to get Greg the Alien on. You have to have some patience.

The best thing to do is to get out in front of an audience as much as you can, and learn from the experience.