Quotes from Hari Nef

Sexuality is who you want to be with. Gender identity is who you want to be in the world.

If I ever called myself an activist, I regret it, and I was cornered into it by an industry who couldn't justify me taking up space without saying that I had some kind of radical political agenda because they saw my participation as a radical political thing. Which it was not.

I've certainly been in situations where I've been rejected and endangered and had my humanity put in question - just as almost every woman on the planet has.

I couldn't remember when I'd stopped willing to be trans and started wanting to be trans. If there were a difference, I'd forgotten it.

I identify with Sad Girls.

I identify with anyone who logged online in elementary school and never logged off.

I think the skin is the most important part of a strong makeup look, and if you take care of that, the rest will follow.

Sometimes it feels like people can't wrap their head around the notion that an 'androgynous' trans woman with shorter hair could be beautiful.

I'm not so fascinated by these ingenue roles. I tend to gravitate towards women in plays or shows or films that are more chaotic or have something dire going on.

When we say 'trans is beautiful' or 'being trans is the best,' that is a truth we created for ourselves that's clearly not true in every signal we get from the world around us.

I've gone from the edgy girl to the girl you call for H&M and L'Oreal, which is something neither I nor the myriad agencies that rejected me when I tried to get signed could have predicted.

What's infuriating is when cis people think celebrating me is celebrating transness.

If you don't know somebody, whether you're inquiring into their sex or their gender, it's invasive.

For me, Instagram had become a place where I could image myself the way I found myself.

Whether you're a woman, a transwoman, a person of color, I feel like Instagram is really important for the creation and framing of the self.

If we didn't desensitize ourselves in some way, every day would feel like its own tragedy.

I don't want the same trans story to be told over and over again. I don't want people to get stuck on this very western idea of what it means to be transgender.

I'm fun, ruthless, articulate, impatient, maybe a little cavalier. I'm a woman and a feminist. I'm transgender. I'm an actress, a reluctant writer, occasionally a potato-shaped model.

I feel like my transition, in a broader sense, began the second I left home and came to New York. Because all of a sudden, I opened myself up to options about how to be.

I feel like the most fascinating parts of a trans life take place after the decision to transition. They take place when you're in this new body, in this new life, and you start realizing things.

I had family who exposed me to all sorts of different media involving actors - films, theatrical productions touring through Boston. My grandparents, particularly my mother's parents, were huge fans of all the arts, and they took me to these shows and exhibits at a very young age, so I was just immersed in it.

My first boyfriend was a fashion designer. He was a junior in high school, I was a freshman.

If anyone says that American socialism isn't possible, point them toward the bowling shoe.

I was really into emo and scene culture in middle school.