Quotes from Jake Johnson

I was really into classifieds for awhile. I'm a big negotiator. My father owned a car dealership when I was younger... it's just in my blood.

I have a group of friends that I'm pretty sentimental about.

I'll be honest, I like shooting 'New Girl.' I like the people. The show is still new to me. I've never done TV like this before.

There were two paths I was on: pre- and post-meeting my wife. I wanted to be an actor, but I didn't have headshots until I met her.

My brother was an improviser. He's now a lobbyist, but he used to perform improv in the city when he was in high school, and one of the funniest guys I know to this day.

I moved to Los Angeles in January 2004 because a buddy of mine, who I met at a friend's wedding, said he could get me a room in his apartment for $500 a month. I took it thinking that it would probably only be about six months before I moved back to Chicago, but I fell in love with it.

I wanted to be a second baseman for the Chicago Cubs. Problem is that my athletic abilities in my mind are greater than what my body can accomplish.

When people do get to see each other and know each other more - you'll see it in New York, all these cultures are together - other cultures become far less scary and less foreign to you.

In L.A., if you're in improv, and you're on those stages, all the big agents and managers and producers are watching those shows. They're not flying to Chicago to see the show. People are booking jobs off the stages in L.A. who aren't more talented than the guys in Chicago. But the most guys book out of L.A., and the second is New York.

I've been lucky enough to have a lot of romantic leads in movies and indies, and you do form a different kind of connection when you do that together as actors.

My dream career would be to be in things that have real heart and are telling real stories but while doing that, you're getting really big laughs. I don't necessarily love the straight crazy comedies. 'Caddyshack' is amazing, but there's not a lot of new 'Caddyshack's.

I'm a family man. I like being home.

I feel like L.A. is more of a showcase, and Chicago is a pure comedy scene where you're doing comedy for comedy. You're doing comedy actually for the audience that's there.

If I were a teacher, I would like to teach freshman English - so I could be the Robin Williams type in 'Dead Poets Society.'

If I took over the 'Glamour' offices for a day, I would put Joe Pesci on the cover. I would say 'We've got to change all these magazines a little bit. We have to bring out a different version of what is, like, cool. You know, what's winning. Joe Pesci, Burt Reynolds.'

I've got a theory with each character I play. Regardless of the actions that they do, I, as Jake, have to like these people. And I have to say, 'I wouldn't mind hanging out with this guy for an hour and a half.'

When you do a Tom Cruise movie, you don't do a Tom Cruise movie and ask a lot of questions.

I had a lot of bad jobs but the one big internship I had is I interned for 'SNL' when I was 21 years old and that was the joke. You intern there and you think man, I'm going to be with the writers and the great comedians. Then you're getting everybody sandwiches and then the doors close and then all the great creatives are doing the work.

I think you can meet the right girl at the wrong time, and it gets screwed up. If you meet the right girl at the wrong time, that girl has to be the most understanding person in the world because there's going to be a lot more bumps in the road.

There are some similarities, I think, with all the characters I play. I'm not a guy who sees the desire to transform with each part; I'm not a piece of clay.

Sometimes, when you work with directors who have done it a lot and are established in the business and know the game, there are all these rules that they have. First-time directors will allow you to come in with choices. They're not so jaded by actors that they're like, 'Ugh, just do your job, man.'

I think that Zoe Kazan is an unbelievable talent.

Zooey Deschanel loves music, loves musical theater, loves the show of it.

People ask me, 'Did you ever want to be a live-action Peter Parker?' Are you kidding me? These actors live in a gym and wear really uncomfortable tights for 14 hours a day. And it's not like you're doing some very fun acting. Shooting is a real drag. Then you do press for five months? I don't think I could get it.