Quotes from John Irving

Look at the world: look at how many of our peerless leaders presume to tell us that they know what God wants! It's not God who's fucked up, it's the screamers who say they believe in Him and who claim to pursue their ends in His holy name!

Candy took the bathing suit from her and used the suit to wipe the tears from Rose Rose's face. You're fine, you're just fine, Candy said to the girl. And you're going to feel better. No one's going to hurt you.

When somebody touches you...and you really don't wanna be touched, that's not really being touched. You still got you inside of you. And nobody has touched you. Not really. You still got you inside of you. You believe that.

Anyone can be sentimental about the Nativity; any fool can feel like a Christian at Christmas. But Easter is the main event; if you don't believe in the resurrection, you're not a believer.

She say to tell you you was the nicest, Muddy told the boy. She say to tell your dad he a hero, and that you was the nicest.

Reading good novels can make young readers seem more experienced about relationships than they are.

But I had to keep my hands under the desk—my fists under the desk, I should say. The White House, that whole criminal mob, those arrogant goons who see themselves as justified to operate above the law—they disgrace democracy by claiming that what they do they do for democracy! They should be in jail. They should be in Hollywood! I know that some of the girls have told their parents that I deliver "ranting lectures" to them about the United States; some

Reading good novels can make almost anything seem imaginable

Father Alfonso and Father Octavio could make Pepe feel as if he were a betrayer of the Catholic faith—as if he were a raving secular humanist, or worse. (Could there be anyone worse, from a Jesuitical perspective?) Father Alfonso and Father Octavio knew their Catholic dogma by rote; while the two priests talked circles around Brother Pepe, and they made Pepe feel inadequate in his belief, they were irreparably doctrinaire.

Murder, more murders, still more murders! The Germans take murder more seriously than we do—I mean, as literature," Uncle Johan explained

You remember how I used to tell you that I was Doctor Larch's helper? Homer asked Angel. Right, said Angel Wells. Well, I got very good--at helping him, Homer said. Very good. I'm not an amateur

What my grandmother meant was that supper was ready to eat. Only the cooking of it was finished. As usual, it was an overcooked casserole of unidentifiable ingredients; it was mortally finished, a casserole cooked into submission. Also finished was what remained of my aunts' patience with my uncles' lack of clarity concerning their wartime memories.

My mother named me Adam, like you-know-who.

Sometimes, when we are labeled, when we are branded, our brand becomes our calling;

Dr. Larch pointed out that Melony had taken Jane Eyre with her; he accepted this as a hopeful sign—wherever Melony went, she would not be without guidance, she would not be without love, without faith; she had a good book with her. If only she'll keep reading it, and reading it, Larch thought.

It had been a startling day for young Copperfield: most of the morning confined in an enema-bag carton; his first attempt at flight; his long fall through the weeds; and then sitting on that dead man's face.

You should listen to these people, Farrokh," his father was telling him. "It isn't necessary for them to be your moral equals in order for you to learn something from them.

Of course, I was not yet born when my mother told her parents she was pregnant

Dear God!" the cook cried. "Soon all the wood on Twisted River will be pulpwood—for paper! What about toboggans is worse than paper?" "Books are made from paper!" Ketchum declared. "What role do toboggans play in your son's education?

En este mundo de cochina mentalidad", piensa Jenny, "eres la esposa de alguien o la puta de alguien; o vas camino de convertirte en una de las dos cosas. Si no encajas en ninguna de las dos categorías, todo el mundo trata de hacerte creer que algo te pasa.

Quería trabajar y vivir sola. Eso me convirtió en sexualmente sospechosa. Después deseé tener un hijo sin que para ello tuviera que compartir mi cuerpo ni mi vida. También eso me convirtió en sexualmente sospechosa.

You have taught yourself to read English, too," Pepe said slowly to the boy; the girl suddenly gave him the shivers, for no known reason. "English is just a little different—I can understand it," the boy told him

But this is what we do: we dream on, and our dreams escape us almost as vividly as we can imagine them. That's what happens, like it or not.

Hago lo que quiero - afirmó Garp -. No le pongas otro nombre. Sólo hago lo que me da la gana... y eso es precisamente lo que hizo mi madre toda su vida, o sea lo que quería hacer.