Quotes from Alexandra Petri

MS Paint was my creative outlet for many years.

Bills ought to be passed with deliberation by committees. Change should be achieved in a bipartisan manner. Incrementally, day by day, we should reach a consensus - not perfect, by any means - but something that we can be proud of, nonetheless.

Thanks to postmodernism, we tend to see all facts as meaningless trivia, no one more vital than any other. Yet this disregard for facts qua facts is intellectually crippling. Facts are the raw material of thought, and the knowledge of significant facts makes sophisticated thought possible.

All the young voters who flocked to Obama in droves grew up watching 'The Daily Show' and the 'Colbert Report.'

Awkward is a state of being.

If awkward has an antithesis, it is probably Barack Obama.

As long as I'm writing stuff and people are reading it, I'll be happy.

If you're doing what you do because you love it, you have room to be happy for others. And that's a lot of fun, when you get down to it.

The difference between face-to-face conversation and any other medium of communication is simple: No distractions are permitted.

Dull words are what make many bright sentences shine. They do not call attention to themselves.

In high school, you at least have to get up at a reasonable hour and show up at places on time. College, on the other hand, gave me the sense that I could complete major assignments at 2 A.M. without suffering any repercussions, along with the erroneous idea that in real life, things started after one in the afternoon.

All children, except two, grow up: Peter Pan and Donald Trump Jr.

Books are wonderful. They are like people, except they mind less when you put them down and wander off to eat something.

Pleasure reading has long been an American ideal - generations of schoolchildren have headed home for the summer toting recreational reading lists. But try to pitch it to a group of non-readers, and they quickly become suspicious.

I swear like a sailor, assuming the sailor in question died in 1800 and was really square.

Some information is important, and some is not, and intelligence consists in knowing one from the other.

My goal is to be weirder than everybody else and hope that no one stops me. So far, no one has.

President Obama deserves our unalloyed praise for hastening Osama bin Laden's demise.

No one has debates on Twitter.

In society at large, nerds are law-abiding, caring, fundamentally good folk who keep the wheels of civilization grinding.

Snow is like a manic pixie dream girl: fun and whimsical when you encounter it only through the barrier of a movie screen - but absolute misery to have to put up with in real life.

The desire for attention has become a primal need along the lines of food, water, and clothing.

The biggest way to be productive is if you're procrastinating on another more important project.

Journalists run many risks. It comes with the profession.