Quotes from Chris Smith

If you want to make more money by closing online leads, you have to pick up the damn phone. If you have more usernames and passwords than customers you are doing it wrong.

If people are engaged, eventually the political system responds, despite the money, despite the lobbyists, it still responds. ~ President Obama

There are people that I believe shouldn't like me, and if they did, I'd be sad. ~ Jon Stewart

I'm kind of relieved I don't have to say anything on TV about tragedies anymore. ~ JON STEWART

The outlandish 2000 election and Bush's victory had come along at the perfect time, helping Stewart, the correspondents, and the writers sharpen The Daily Show's tone of bemused mockery. The next world-changing events would have just as big an effect—and a late-night, basic cable comedy show would become an unlikely outlet for mourning, an antidote to anxiety, and gradually a center of principled, patriotic dissent.

Bush, it will go down in history, it's unbelievable that guy was president. Unbelievable. I'm sure, I'm 100 percent sure, in one hundred years, in one thousand years if society's still standing, they're going to say, "That guy was president? Like, what?" I know that to be a fact. RORY

or the need for a Trump 2012 presidential campaign ("This is what I've been waiting for my whole life, a president who's not afraid to tell the truth about being a lying asshole!")

If comedy is tragedy plus time, I need more fucking time. But I would really settle for less fucking tragedy." LARRY

People give Jon shit and claim he breeds cynicism. He's the opposite of cynical. He really cares. And people who watch his show care about politics. That's why you watch it, and that's why you're not watching a Yogi Bear cartoon.

We were doing a joke having to do with Toy Story, the last one, Toy Story 3. We were saying it was a tearjerker, and Jon's like, "What made it a tearjerker?" So I was telling him the premise of the story: Andy goes off to college and leaves all of his toys behind. Jon says, "I don't get it, what's so sad?" And I was like, "Oh my God, you're Andy and we're your toys. Holy shit, you insensitive prick!

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I don't just write letters. I write laws.