Quotes from Ellie Taylor

I'm definitely my worst critic. I guess that's good because it keeps you on your toes.

I was working in a day job in marketing but I had my sights on doing an open-mic night.

I have no maternal instincts.

I've had some bad gigs, don't get me wrong.

My dad's pretty funny. He's funny for all of the wrong reasons. The first time I did standup at Edinburgh he sat in the front row and wore sunglasses because he didn't want to put me off.

When I was younger it was people like Victoria Wood who I loved.

If you haven't truly died a million times as a comic you haven't gigged enough!

Playing the Hammersmith Apollo was pretty special.

Lots of people do stand up shows with no narrative, but I love a beginning, a middle and an end.

I started comedy as a hobby with no intention of making it my career.

My sister told me: 'You need to have a baby so that you've got someone to look after you when you're old.' And I was like: 'Hang on - I thought that's what the NHS was for? Unless the NHS is that screwed by the time I'm old, you've literally had to give birth to your own medical professional.'

I did a standup show called 'Show Me the Funny,' so from that I got some TV stuff and people would book me for gigs. I wasn't really good enough at that point, so had to catch up with expectations.

I want to do everything, so when I started I wanted to be an actress, and I've always written funny things. I love that; it gives me a real sense of achievement and joy. I also love presenting. I'd never been interested in it before but found it pretty fun and easy, and I really enjoyed working with a group - standup is so lonely.

There's always someone out there being mean, but what upsets me is the spite. Why are you like that? Why are you so horrible?

I would like to go to the Oscars. I'm not even talking about being nominated - although that would be lovely. Even if it was I won a competition on the back of a crisp packet to go to the Oscars I would like to go to the Oscars.

I can't drink anything after 9 P.M. otherwise I'm up all night.

I want a dragon.

I drink loads of water.