Quotes from John Scalzi

You say 'cure.' I hear 'you're not human enough.

Cutting the power was necessary to reboot security and other systems, they said. Power will resume momentarily. Be ready to move when it does. Enjoy this music until then! The tablet began playing soothing instrumental versions of modern popular hits. Kiva didn't know whether to shit or hum along.

I do not mind when you tell me what you want and put that first instead of last.

Then you're seventy-five, friends are dead, and you've replaced at least one major organ: you have to pee four times a night, and you can't go up a flight a stairs without being little winded -- and your're told you're in pretty good shape for your age. [....], in a decade you'll be eighty-five, and the only difference between you and a raisin will be that while you're both wrinkled and without a prostate, the raisin never had a prostate to begin with.

This is my first time working with a human," Werd said, to Wilson. "How's it going so far?" Wilson asked. "Not bad," Werd said. "You're kind of ugly, though." "I get that a lot," Wilson said. "I bet you do," Werd said. "I won't hold it against you." "Thanks," Wilson said. "But if you smell, I'm pushing you out an airlock," Werd said.

We buy time where we may." "You bought yourself time," Oi agreed. "I don't think it's of very good quality.

I live the life I live, and it's the only life I have. No one else is out there in the universe living my alternate lives, and even if they were, I wouldn't be worrying about them because I have my life to live here, now.

Is it painful? the groundskeeper asked. I am asking for science.

Some planets evolved genetic structures roughly similar to Earth's, incorporating some if not all the nucleotides involved in terrestrial genetics (perhaps not coincidentally, the intelligent species of these planets have been known to consume humans from time to time;

You're all so busy tending to your own personal tree that you don't look around to see that the forest is on fire.

They were the only people in all the universe who were not conscious. Although every creature could think and reason, it could not know itself as every other intelligent creature could know itself. The creatures lacked awareness of who they were as individuals, even as they lived and thrived and grew on the face of the moon of the planet.

It's not that Seaborg disliked Harvey, but after a couple of combat drops with the 2nd Platoon one got the sense that if you didn't like things to explode unnecessarily around you, you would want to stay well clear of Daniel Harvey.

If there's one thing that distinguishes the human species, it is a pathological need to stay connected. The fact your people will interrupt sex to answer your communicators is a scandal across the entire Common Confederation.

You asked for help," Wilson said. I also tried to blow up your ship with you in it. "That was before you knew me," Wilson said. I'm sorry about that. "I'm not going to tell you not to be sorry," Wilson said, "but I can understand wanting to get your body back.

Who are you, who is so wise in the way of alien fungus?

At dinner members of the 8th enthusiastically told each other to pass the fucking salt, you fucking sack of shit, until Brahe told them to quit that goddamn shit, cocksuckers, because it got old pretty goddamn quick.

But we get to live as long as we're useful. And that is a rare privilege.

On the sixth day, Jared and the rest of the 8th finally figured out what that sex thing was all about. On the seventh day, and as a direct consequence of the sixth day, they rested.

You don't have paperwork," Savitri said. "You give it all to me." "Is it done?" I asked. "As far as you know, yes," Savitri said.

Is something funny, Lord Marce?" asked a young woman, standing in front of a desk. She was wearing imperial green. This was clearly the emperox, and equally clearly he'd just blown his entrance. He bowed. "I'm sorry, Your Majesty," he said. "I was surprised by your office." "How so?" "I … well. Ma'am. It looks like a museum exploded inside of it.

Conservatives: Self-hating moral relativists, unless you can convince me that an intellectual class that publicly praises family values but privately engages in sodomy, coke and trophy wives is more aptly described in some other way.

I don't know that it will matter even then," Cardenia said. "I'm continually confronted with the human tendency to ignore or deny facts until the last possible instant. And then for several days after that, too.

You've got yourself a cloned body here, Jim.

I don't have a problem with treason," I said. "I can stop anytime." I