Quotes from John Scalzi

I wish I had this screen in my living room, Harry said. I'd have had the most popular Super Bowl parties on the block.

Anything worth doing is worth doing at a fevered pitch.

the most important days of your existence don't always announce themselves in obvious ways.

Ayn Rand's A Selfish Christmas (1951) In this hour-long radio drama, Santa struggles with the increasing demands of providing gifts

You know humans have a bad reputation. Among the rest of us. "I've heard," Wilson said. That you're deceptive. That you'll go against your contracts and treaties. That you're terrified of all of us and your way of solving that problem is trying to destroy us all. "But on the bright side, we all have lovely singing voices," Wilson said.

The problem with aging is not that it's one damn thing after another—it's every damn thing, all at once, all the time. You

As a general rule when it's a city bus versus any biological creature, it's safe to bet on the bus.

Which news do you want first?" Vnac Oi asked me. I was in its office again, the first meeting of the sur. "You have good news?" I asked. "No," Oi said. "But some of the news is less objectively bad than the rest." "Then by all means let us begin with that.

generally perfectly okay for most other folks. When a lie has negative consequences, people dislike it. But otherwise? They move on, and eventually the lie as a lie is forgotten, or in this case, codified as the foundation of religious practice and buffed and sanded into something prettier and more congenial.

What I was doing was small potatoes, in the general scheme of legally shaky endeavors. But the IRS liked going after the small potatoes. The small potatoes put up less of a fight when you mashed them.

Do any of the private companies send reps or IT guys here?

Their lives were their own, and in their way they loved and feared and wondered and hoped. They did not expect me to be the end of all of that.

How do you feel?" "I have a headache," Lee said. "My muscles are sore. I am dying of thirst. I have to pee. I am restrained. I'm blind. How are you?" "Better than you, I will admit

He was originally from Guatemala but immigrated to the United States when he was a kid. He was the one to solve the buffer overflow—

When you find them, blow them up a little for me.

The doors opened. We shuffled out, stepped through the doorway onto the gangplank, and were immediately swarmed by apparently all the small flying insects that ever existed in the history of the universe.

I think I'll keep my own opinion out of the 'sale' rack, if it's all the same to you.

under oath he revealed the course was designed by taking holes from the courses he found on a PlayStation-era Tiger Woods video game. This resulted in Loudoun County being sued by Pebble Beach, Cog Hill and St. Andrews, not only for stealing from their courses, but for doing it so poorly that it damaged the original courses' reputations.

if you live in the United States, and you are reading this prior to November 2020, please do me a favor and (a) Register to vote, or check to make sure your registration is still valid, (b) Remember to vote on election day (or before if you take an early ballot) and (c) Try not to vote for anyone who is a whirling amoral vortex of chaos... John Scalzi October 31, 2019

It's about the limitations of travel and communication. We don't live in a science fiction universe, Mr. Daquin. We can't just zap messages instantaneously from one part of space to another.

Are you saying you expected us to fail?" Berkeley asked. "I'm saying I have an appreciation for the fact that plans are plans

I find some amusement at the idea of you as a child, of you reaching no higher than my waist, of you big-eyed, and your big head wobbly on your neck, looking at the world with curiosity if not comprehension, needing to wait years to know enough to know how little you know.

What is it about being married you miss?" Alan asked. "Well, I miss my wife, you know," I said. "But I also miss the feeling of, I don't know, comfort. The sense you're where you're supposed to be, with someone you're supposed to be with.

Where is Ivan?