Quotes from Jeff Lindsay

could have said that the best way to catch a psycho motherfucker is by understanding what makes him a psycho motherfucker, but I doubted that Deborah would be very receptive to that message right now. Besides, it wasn't really true. Based on my years of experience in the business, the best way to catch a killer is by getting lucky.

My sister is an excellent shot with a pistol, and no doubt has many other sterling character traits, but putting her in front of a computer is like asking a donkey to do the polka, and she very wisely left all her Googling to me. "All right," I said. "I can search for the name 'Vlad,' but—

And, unfortunately for all concerned—except possibly the ghost of J. Edgar Hoover, who must have been hovering protectively in a spectral house frock—sitting next to Chambers was Special Agent Brenda Recht.

And a man who discovers his pants are on fire tends to have very little time to worry about somebody else's box of matches.

It was a very nice lobby, if you like old terrazzo floors and golden wallpaper, peeling slightly at the edges. A bored clerk at the desk was tapping at an iPad. He didn't even look up as we went past to the elevators, and I found to my delight that one of them was right there on the ground floor, waiting for us.

AS FAR AS I KNOW, I HAVE NEVER SAUNTERED. TO BE completely honest, I doubt very much that I have even strolled, but sauntering is far beyond me. When I go somewhere, it is with a clear purpose in mind, and although I hesitate to sound boastful, more often than not I tend to stride.

He smirked at me. "Channel Hog," he said. "Biggest goddamned hammerhead shark known to man. Over twenty feet long, and always hungry. I truly would not recommend taking a swim out there, buddy.

The smile, as tiny as it was, lasted until I got almost to my chair, when I ran into Vince Masuoka, headed out at full speed as I was trying to head in. We collided forcefully, and because I am larger than Vince, he bounced off me and into the doorframe. "Ouch, my elbow!" he said, quickly straightening and rubbing his arm where it had banged against the frame. "Got another one!" "Another elbow?" I said. "Big deal. Everyone has two.

Being dead doesn't hurt at all. It's being alive that hurts. And it's a lot more dangerous than being dead, too.

Have you ever noticed that when you're right on track everything else starts to go right, too? It's like the universe is saying Good job! Have a sandwich!

Deborah and I went in past a sculpture that looked like a geometry lesson having sex in a hardware bin and we walked straight to the back, where a door announced, DR. J. LONOFF, DDS: COSMETIC DENTISTRY.

Deborah just watched him as he skidded to a stop in front of her. He seemed young for a dentist, maybe thirty, and in all honesty he looked a little too buff, too, as though he had been pumping iron when he should have been filling cavities. Deborah

It's like, everything really is two ways, the way we all pretend it is and the way it really is. And you already know that and it's like a game for you.

But as I look around me at all the absurdly expensive fuss and clutter, I ask it anyway. How did I get here?

Anyway," Rita said, leaning back away from Cody. "It would save some money. Which we will need for the new pool cage, because they are very pricey." "All right," I said, not completely sure what I was agreeing to do.

It was beautiful—in a terrible sort of way, of course. But still, the arrangement was perfect, compelling, beautifully bloodless.

Traffic lurched forward. I crawled slowly past a flatbed truck that was pulled off onto the grass beside the road. The hood of the truck was up. Seven or eight men in dingy clothes sat on the bed of the truck. They were waiting, too, but they seemed a little happier about it than I was. Maybe they weren't being pursued by an insane homicidal artist.

A cluster of yachts was anchored at the far side, and a smaller boat with a National Park Service logo on the side was tied at the dock. We slowed, turned, and slid in next to it. I

Rita sighed and smiled happily. "Anyway," she said again, and I had to agree.

AND NOW HERE I WAS IN THE LAP OF LUXURY, FAR FROM THE hooting and screeching and dirty socks of my normal domestic life. It probably wasn't fair to compare, of course, which was a good thing. This hotel made even my new, swimming-pooled house seem squalid—made my whole little life seem just a bit less bright and shiny.

looked some more. Beside the ship, cargo cranes reared up into the night sky like abandoned props from Star Wars. A

What Robert was trying to do so intently was, in fact, no more than craft. He did no more than copy my tics and twitches—even to the point of staring at my family portrait, a very personal part of my disguise, for his character research—

People would always rather muddle along in their own dim, blundering way than have someone else point out where they were going wrong—even if that other person is clearly brighter.

God, it's like I have something, deep down inside of me, that i think is undeserving of love.