Quotes from Mo Rocca

It's much easier to make jokes about sensitive issues if there is some dissent, some conflict.

Look, not embracing the 'Today' show is soooo yesterday.

A young imagination is bold, likes to make bigger leaps. It likes to, well, imagine that the dustbuster is a dinosaur; that the computer mouse is a hotrod; that the box is a cave; that the rawhide is a torch... or a baton... or something.

I'm in fact a hair under six feet, but I'm very svelte. People would never see me if I turned sideways.

No, no, no separate but equal... never the twain shall meet. And the pendulum kept swinging and it came to rest in the bastard hybrid known as the Daily Show.

I'd rather call myself a mischief-maker, an imp, rather than a satirist. Satirist sounds so self important. Plus no one is calling himself an imp right now. It makes me feel special.

I still don't know how to cook and that's just unacceptable.

My sophomore year I spent exactly one day on the JV football team. It was the tryout day.

While some of my closest friends were jocks, it seemed that they spoke a different language with each other. Joining in their conversation was fraught with risk.

Did I end up finding a little blue pill to cure America's electoral dysfunction? Unfortunately, it's not that simple.

Generally I get up at around 7. But oftentimes, I'll be lolling in bed a little bit earlier - sometimes as early as 5:45 - filing in my mind all the things I have to get done. Which is, of course, totally unproductive.

I know a lot about a few things - mostly useless things.

Christmas is a stocking stuffed with sugary goodness.

Honestly we never lied to people about who we were. Usually the wackier interviews came to pass because the interview subjects, aware that we were Comedy Central, just wanted to get their stories out.

Digital television, satellite radio, videogames, iPods - so much media. Do books even matter anymore?

I have a dream, and a plan, to combine the commercial possibilities of Valentine's Day with the substance and meaning of black history month. I call it: Blackentine's Day.

When it comes to war, we focus more on the mainstream coverage of the event, rather than the event itself. People dying is never funny. Protest puppets are always funny.

It's interesting, because I tend to trust a man with big ears.

A young imagination is bold, likes to make bigger leaps. It likes to, well, imagine that the dustbuster is a dinosaur that the computer mouse is a hotrod that the box is a cave that the rawhide is a torch... or a baton... or something.

Christmas is a stocking stuffed with sugary goodness.

Yes, I still love 'South Park ' but I also love morning TV now.

One Christmas my father kept our tree up till March. He hated to see it go. I loved that.

I love the excess of Christmas. The shopping season that begins in September, the bad pop star recordings of Christmas carols, the decorations that don't know when to come down.

I think that Obama is very cool. And I think he's clever, and I think he can be witty. But I don't think he's funny in either the way that Reagan was funny - or John McCain and Dick Cheney are both funny in that ruthless, kind of mean way.