Quotes from Jerry Stiller

Money is sensual.

It can make you sad to look at pictures from your youth. So there's a trick to it. The trick is not to look at the later pictures.

During the Great Depression, when people laughed their worries disappeared. Audiences loved these funny men. I decided to become one.

It can make you sad to look at pictures from your youth. So there's a trick to it. The trick is not to look at the later pictures.

I don't think my judgment is that good. I don't know what is funny.

We managed to hang in there. Today when people get married there's a tendency to run away when things get tough. There is a lot of strength in hanging together.

So kiss me where the sun don't shine, and I don't mean London.

I ask myself why I do it. Maybe it's to prove I'm still around. It takes a lot out of my body. I'm not an NBA player anymore. At my age, very few people can handle it.

Never go for the punch line. There might be something funnier on the way.

Anne is very forgiving. She doesn't care about money, being rich, or clothes. We never argued about finances.

Some of the routines come back very easily. We do it off the top of our heads.

The worst thing in this business is to be thought of as a no-talent.

I loved the idea of touching base with an audience.

We managed to hang in there. Today when people get married there's a tendency to run away when things get tough. There is a lot of strength in hanging together.

I've been around the block a lot and I've had a merry trail for 55 years.

Creative comedy is like growing geraniums in a mine field.

During the Great Depression, when people laughed their worries disappeared. Audiences loved these funny men. I decided to become one.

I ask myself why I do it [work]. Maybe it's to prove I'm still around. It takes a lot out of my body. I'm not an NBA player anymore. At my age, very few people can handle it.

My father and mother - I figured if I could make them laugh, they'd stop fighting. I stole all their material.

Being on a sitcom stops me from getting Alzheimer's.

I shave without using shaving cream.

Hollywood never knew there was a Vietnam War until they made the movie.

I don't think my judgment is that good. I don't know what is funny.