Quotes from Roald Dahl

Two wrongs don't make a right.

These books gave Matilda a hopeful and comforting message: You are not alone.

Obscurity is never a virtue.

I will not pretend I wasn't petrified. I was. But mixed in with the awful fear was a glorious feeling of excitement. Most of the really exciting things we do in our lives scare us to death. They wouldn't be exciting if they didn't.

It is most unlikely. But--here comes the big but--not impossible.

Now that I am alone, I don't have to hide it; I don't have to hide anything any longer. I can let my face go because no one can see me; because there's twenty-one thousand feet between me and them... No, I don't have to press my teeth together or tighten the muscles of my jaw...

The little pig began to pray But Wolfie blew his house away. He shouted, Bacon, Pork, and Ham! Oh what a lucky wolf I am! And though he ate the pig quite fast, He carefully kept the tail till last.

Never do anything by halves if you want to get away with it. Be outrageous...

You mean you live down here?' Matilda asked. 'I do', Miss Honey replied, but she said no more. Matilda had never once stopped to think about where Miss Honey might be living. She had always regarded her purely as a teacher, a person who turned up out of nowhere and taught at school and then went away again.

You is getting nosier than a parker.

It is almost worth going away because it's so lovely coming back.

Hooray! said the Chief of the Army. Let's blow everyone up! Bang-bang! Bang-bang!

We are all a great deal luckier that we realize, we usually get what we want - or near enough.

There are a whole lot of things in this world of ours you haven't even started wondering about yet.

Rainbow drops - suck them and you can spit in six different colours.

When you're old enough to write a book for children, by then you'll have become a grown up and have lost all your jokeyness. Unless you're an undeveloped adult and still have an enormous amount of childishness in you.

Words', he said, 'is oh such a twitch-tickling problem to me all my life. So you must simply try to be patient and stop squibbling. As I am telling you before, I know exactly what words I am wanting to say, but somehow or other they is always getting squiff-squiddled around.

The only sensible thing to do when you are attacked is, as Napoleon once said, to counter-attack.

We must hurry!' said Mr. Wonka. 'We have so much time and so little to do! No! Wait! Strike that! Reverse it!

A stodgy parent is no fun at all. What a child wants and deserves is a parent who is SPARKY

Human beans is the only animals that is killing their own kind.

Dreams is full of mystery and magic . . . . Do not try to understand them.

Make sure everything you do is so completely crazy it's unbelievable.

Mice, I felt pretty certain, all like each other. People don't.