Quotes from Jerome K. Jerome

Ciekawa rzecz, nikt nigdy nie miaÅ' morskiej choroby na lÄ…dzie. Tylko na morzu spotyka siÄ™ mnóstwo ludzi chorych jak nieszcz??cie, caÅ'y ?ywy Å'adunek cierpiÄ…cych.

That trout lay shattered into a thousand fragments - I say a thousand, but they may only have been nine hundred. I did not count them.

It could be done with a little good will all round," he continued, "and nine men out of every ten would be the better off. But they won't even let you explain. Their newspapers shout you down. It's such a damned fine world for the few: never mind the many.

It is so pleasant to come across people more stupid than ourselves. We love them at once for being so.

People who have tried it, tell me that a clear conscience makes you very happy and contented; but a full stomach does the business quite as well, and is cheaper, and more easily obtained.

I want a house that has gotten over all its troubles I don't want to spend the rest of my life bringing up a young and inexperienced house.

It is in our faults and failings, not in our virtues, that we touch each other, and find sympathy. It is in our follies that we are one.

Idleness, like kisses, to be sweet must be stolen.

What readers ask nowadays in a book is that it should improve, instruct, and elevate. This book wouldn't elevate a cow.

Swearing relieves the feelings - that is what swearing does. I explained this to my aunt on one occasion, but it didn't answer with her. She said I had no business to have such feelings.

"Not sure," he retorted; "you call yourself a journalist, and admit there is a subject under Heaven of which you are not sure!"

The proverbial Englishman, we know from old chronicler Froissart, takes his pleasures sadly, and the Englishwoman goes a step further and takes her pleasures in sadness itself.

Give an average baby a fair chance, and if it doesn't do something it oughtn't to a doctor should be called in at once.

It is well we cannot see into the future. There are few boys of fourteen who would not feel ashamed of themselves at forty.