Quotes from Samantha Bee

It's great when you have people who will speak passionately and honestly about what they are doing.

A lot of funny stuff happens in Canada.

President Trump - God forbid - the country will be okay, I promise. I don't know exactly what the country will look like, but we will survive it.

Speaking for myself, I try to go out there on the stage and make jokes with people, so I'm not really thinking about the impact anything I have. If it does resonate with people, that's really great.

My apartment is the equivalent of one room in my Toronto home. Now I understand why New Yorkers are on the streets at all hours. People don't want to stay inside for fear they'll go crazy.

The best part about poker is there's no down side.

I think the show does better with newsmakers and politicians than it does with actors.

It is so expensive to take care of my hair and keep it looking like I was born with it, when my real hair is the color of rat fur.

Kids do have to learn that life is a humiliating charade of endless disappointment and tragedy ultimately culminating in pain, decay, and death. My parents used to sing me to sleep with that one.

I am a cookbook fanatic.

It's not every day people fly you to New York for auditions.

You have to be willing to ask questions that almost no one else would ask.

I never believe them when they say that because you really have to sort of be aware of what's going on in the news in order to get the jokes on the show.

If I could live in New York the rest of my life, I absolutely would, but it's also prohibitively expensive and you have to be working. New York is a lot nicer when you have a job.

It was only a few years ago that I couldn't get hired to save my life.

Last year people won more than one billion dollars playing poker. And casinos made twenty-seven billion just by being around those people.

Christmas: It's the only religious holiday that's also a federal holiday. That way, Christians can go to their services, and everyone else can sit at home and reflect on the true meaning of the separation of church and state.

Don't judge me. I made a lot of money.

I hate birthdays. I thought that I only hated my own birthday, and then I realized that I hate my children's birthdays too.

I hate birthdays. I thought that I only hated my own birthday, and then I realized that I hate my children's birthdays too.

I think NASCAR's coming to Canada now so it'll take on a whole new relevance. Be afraid.

There's always going to be someone who hates you. There's always going to be people who love you. It's a risk in either direction.

I continue to be very shy. I think a lot of actors and performers are really weird, shy people working it out onstage. I don't know why that is.

I'm shy, but I'm not clinically shy. I don't have social anxiety disorder or anything like that. I more have a gentle shyness. Like, I have a little trouble mingling at parties.