Quotes from David D. Burns

The perception of unfairness or injustice is the ultimate cause of most, if not all, anger... In fact, fairness is simply a perceptual interpretation... Your assumption that they are "being unfair" implies that your way of looking at things is universally accepted.

It can work the other way as well. I have worked with many depressed patients who were still stuck after I had tried numerous psychotherapeutic interventions. When I prescribed an antidepressant medication, many of these patients started to turn the corner, and the psychotherapy began to work better. It seemed as if the medication really did help them change their negative thinking patterns as they recovered from the depression.

This isn't a new idea. Nearly two thousand years ago the Greek philosopher, Epictctus, stated that people are disturbed "not by things, but by the views we take of them." In the Book of Proverbs (23: 7) in the Old Testament you can find this passage: "For as he thinks within himself, so he is." And even Shakespeare expressed a similar idea when he said: "for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so" (Hamlet, Act 2, Scene 2).

When you confront the monster you

Are there some advantages, or benefits, of this negative thought or feeling? How might it be helpful to me? What does this negative thought or feeling show about me and my core values that's beautiful, positive, or even awesome?

After all, we're all imperfect, and others have the right to tell us about it from time to time. But are you obliged to make yourself miserable and hate yourself every time someone flies off the handle or puts you down?

Anxiety results from the perception of danger. You can't feel anxious unless you tell yourself that something terrible is about to happen.

you can change your mood by changing how you think.

Bu dünyan?n olaylar?, sizi öfkelendirmiyor. S?cak düÅŸünceleriniz öfkelendiriyor. Gerçekten olumsuz bir olay olduÄŸunda bile duygusal tepkinizi belirleyen ona yüklediÄŸiniz anlamd?r.

And most important, nobody could love or relate to you. It would be impossible to feel any love for someone who was flawless and knew it all. Doesn't that sound lonely, boring, and miserable? Are you so sure you still want perfection? Part V Defeating Hopelessness and Suicide

I suspect you will find that a great many of your negative feelings are in fact based on such thinking errors.

Some encouraging studies suggest that the answer may be yes. Dr. Isaac Marks, from the Institute of Psychiatry at the University of London, has shown that many individuals can overcome anxiety disorders using CBT techniques without face-to-face psychotherapy or medications. I'm hopeful that this book will prove just as effective for people with anxiety as Feeling Good has been for people struggling with depression. However, no

People who are prone to anxiety are nearly always people-pleasers who fear conflict and negative feelings like anger. When you feel upset, you sweep

Mental Filter. You pick out a negative detail in any situation and dwell on it exclusively, thus perceiving that the whole situation is negative.

Or if you wish to put more of a barb in your comments, you can always say, "Yes, Mom, I have in fact decided to get out of bed in spite of the fact that you've been telling me to!

It did not eliminate the tumor, but it did restore her missing self-esteem, and that made all the difference in the way she felt.

Now practice going through this version of the scenario each night until you have mastered it and can fantasize handling the situation effectively and calmly in this manner. This cognitive rehearsal will enable you to program yourself to respond in a more assertive and relaxed way when the actual situation confronts you again.

three types of effective treatment for depression: antidepressant medications, individual and group psychotherapy, and bibliotherapy.

Jeffrey discovered that the truth was the opposite of what he'd always believed. He'd always tried to keep his weaknesses and vulnerabilities hidden because he thought they were so shameful. But in spite of all his wealth, power, and success, Jeffrey had never really gotten close to people or discovered any inner peace or happiness. In contrast, his human, vulnerable

It would be nice if I could make my wife happy now because she seems upset. I can ask what she's upset about and see if there might be a way I could help. Or instead of I shouldn't have eaten the ice cream, you can say, It would have been better if I hadn't eaten the ice cream, but it's not the end of the world that I did.

You'd probably start laughing because you'd realize that your fears had been the result of a gigantic cosmic joke that had persisted throughout all of your previous reincarnations.

First, you'd discover that the monster was not real. You'd realize that it was just an illusion that you never had anything to fear in the first place. You'd see that the monster had no teeth. This would be an incredible triumph.

Ä°nsan için deÄŸer kavram?n?n tam bir soyutlama olduÄŸunu kabul etmelisiniz. Ä°nsani deÄŸer diye bir ÅŸey asl?nda yok. Bu nedenle de ona sahip olup olmamak diye bir ÅŸey de yok ve bu ölçülebilir bir ÅŸey deÄŸil.

Next I asked Maria the miracle cure question: If a miracle happened in today's session, what miracle would she be hoping for?