Quotes from Noel Coward

How was your flight? Well, aeronautically it was a great success. Socially, it left quite a bit to be desired.

But why, oh why, do the wrong people travel, when the right people stay at home?

Never trust a man with short legs. His brains are too near his bottom.

For gin, in cruel sober truth, supplies the fuel for flaming youth.

To know you are among people whom you love, and who love you – that has made all the successes wonderful, much more wonderful than they'd have been anyway.

Mona Lisa looks as if she has just been sick, or is about to be.

I will accept anything in the theatre . . . provided it amuses or moves me. But if it does neither, I want to go home.

Just say the lines and don't trip over the furniture.

I'll go and see anything so long as it amuses me, or moves me. If it doesn't do either I want to go home.

There isn't a particle of you that I don't know, remember, and want.

I have a memory like an elephant. In fact, elephants often consult me.

As one gets older, one discovers everything is going to be exactly the same with different hats on.

That strange feeling we had in the war. Have you found anything in your lives since to equal it in strength? A sort of splendid carelessness it was, holding us together.

The higher the building the lower the morals.

My body has certainly wandered a good deal, but I have an uneasy suspicion that my mind has not wandered enough.

It is not the eyes of others that I am wary of, but my own.

My advice about acting? Speak clearly, don't bump into people, and if you must have motivation, think of your pay packet on Friday.

Good heavens, television is something you appear on, you don't watch.

Let's drink to the spirit of gallantry and courage that made a strange Heaven out of unbelievable Hell, and let's drink to the hope that one day this country of ours, which we love so much, will find dignity and greatness and peace again.

I never cared who scored the goal, or which side won the silver cup. I never learned to bat or bowl; but I heard the curtain going up.

Marriage is the aftermath of love.

Squash - that's not exercise, it's flagellation.

Work hard, do the best you can, don't ever lose faith in yourself and take no notice of what other people say about you.

At twelve noon, The natives swoon And no further work is doneBut mad dogs and Englishmen, Go out in the midday sun.