Quotes from Brendan Behan

There's no one, no one, loves you like yourself.

At the innermost core of all loneliness is a deep and powerful yearning for union with one's lost self.

It is a good deed to forget a poor joke.

The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.

There's no bad publicity except an obituary.

It's not that the Irish are cynical. It's rather that they have a wonderful lack of respect for everything and everybody.

The Bible was a consolation to a fellow alone in the old cell. The lovely thin paper with a bit of matress stuffing in it, if you could get a match, was as good a smoke as I ever tasted.

I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.

I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.

If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks.

He was born an Englishman and remained one for years.

Other people have a nationality. The Irish and the Jews have a psychosis.

I respect kindness in human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.

I'm a drinker with writing problems.

Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it's done, they've seen it done every day, but they're unable to do it themselves.

It's not that the Irish are cynical. It's rather that they have a wonderful lack of respect for everything and everybody.

They took away our land, our language, and our religion; but they could never harness our tongues...

When I came back to Dublin I was courtmartialed in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.

I have never seen a situation so dismal that a policeman couldn't make it worse.

Every cripple has his own way of walking.

I saw a sign that said 'Drink Canada Dry'. So I did.

I only drink on two occasions—when I'm thirsty and when I'm not.

Ah, bless you, Sister, may all your sons be bishops.

There is no such thing as bad publicity...except your own obituary