Quotes from Douglas Adams

Zaphod marched quickly down the passageway, nervous as hell, but trying to hide it by striding purposefully.

David Attenborough has said that Bali is the most beautiful place in the world, but he must have been there longer than we were, and seen different bits, because most of what we saw in the couple of days we were there sorting out our travel arrangements was awful. It was just the tourist area, i.e., that part of Bali which has been made almost exactly the same as everywhere else in the world for the sake of people who have come all this way to see Bali.

So, the world is fine. We don't have to save the world—the world is big enough to look after itself. What we have to be concerned about, is whether or not the world we live in, will be capable of sustaining us in it. That's what we need to think about.

You just come along with me and have a good time. The Galaxy's a fun place. You'll need to have this fish in your ear.

There are some oddities in the perspective with which we see the world.

Unfortunately this Electric Monk had developed a fault, and had started to believe all kinds of things, more or less at random. It was even beginning to believe things they'd have difficulty believing in Salt Lake City.

And then, just when you think that you have experienced all the wonders that this world has to offer, you round a peak and suddenly think you're doing the whole thing over again, but this time on drugs.

The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.

Well the hours are good...' ... 'but now you come to mention it, most of the actual minutes are pretty lousy.

The chances of finding out what's really going on in the universe are so remote, the only thing to do is hang the sense of it and keep yourself occupied.

You're a jerk,' repeated the alien, 'a complete asshole.

He felt like an old sponge steeped in paraffin and left in the sun to dry.

I vaguely remember my schooldays. They were what was going on in the background while I was trying to listen to the Beatles.

To summarize: it is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it. To summarize the summary: anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem.

In moments of great stress, every life form that exists gives out a tiny subliminal signal.

Aberystwyth (n.) A nostalgic yearning which is in itself more pleasant than the thing being yearned for.

Alltami (n.) The ancient art of being able to balance the hot and cold shower taps.

Would you like to see the menu? he said, or would you like meet the Dish of the Day? ... "Good evening," it lowed and sat back heavily on its haunches, "I am the main Dish of the Day. May I interest you in parts of my body?

He sniggered. He didn't like to think of himself as the sort of person who giggled or sniggered, but he had to admit that he had been giggling and sniggering almost continuously for well over half an hour now.

It gives me my headache just trying to think down to your level

Let us be dreamers, thinkers, speculative philosophers, or as our spouses would have it: Idiots

You barbarians!' he yelled. 'I'll sue the council for every penny it's got! I'll have you hung, drawn and quartered! And whipped! And boiled...until...until...until...until you've had enough.' Ford was running after him. Very very fast. 'And then I will do it again!' yelled Arthur, 'And when I've finished I will take all the little bits, and I will jump on them!

He turned slowly like a fridge door opening.

I've never understood all this fuss people make about the dawn. I've seen a few and they're never as good as the photographs, which have the additional advantage of being things you can look at when you're in the right frame of mind, which is usually around lunchtime.