Quotes from Alan Morinis

THE LUXURIES WE indulge in eventually come to seem to be necessities, as if we could not live without them. —RABBI YISRAEL SALANTER (1810–1883)

PEOPLE SEARCH relentlessly for a "city of happiness"—not realizing that it could only be found in a "state of mind." —RABBI AVRAHAM PAM (1913–2001)

EVERY SIN CAUSES a special anxiety on the spirit, which can only be erased by repentance, which transforms the anxiety itself into inner security and courage. —RABBI ABRAHAM ISAAC KOOK (1865–1935)

MODESTY AT A WEDDING means rejoicing fully in the singing, dancing, and feasting while inwardly striving to direct all of those activities for the happiness of the wedding couple, not for oneself. —RABBI NOSSON TZVI FINKEL, THE ALTER OF SLABODKA (1849–1927)

COMPASSION IS AN EXTREMELY noble soul-trait. Anything that one can do to cultivate this soul-trait, one should exert oneself to do. Just as one wishes to receive compassion in one's own time of need, so too, one should pity others when they are in need. As it is written: "And you should love your neighbor as yourself" (Leviticus 19:18). —ORCHOT TZADDIKIM (1540)

THE SINGLE, INTEGRATED inner experience of caring for, respecting, and bonding to another is love. The object of your love is one whom you care about even more than you are concerned for your own self. You would do or give what the other needs without the slightest feeling that what you have done or given is a sacrifice at all. Those acts and gifts are the fulfillment of love, and life.

A YOUNG STUDENT asked permission to go to a wedding. Rabbi Eliyahu Lopian (1872–1970) asked him if there might be women there dressed immodestly. The student replied that he had prepared a strategy: he wouldn't look. Rabbi Lopian turned to the student and said, "I'm already over eighty years old, and blind in one eye, yet despite this, I look!

The central statement of faith in Judaism is the Sh'ma, which reads: "Hear Israel, the Lord your God, the Lord is One." Only in silence is it possible to hear.

EARTHLY PLEASURES and satisfactions bring many good feelings, but joy comes from a higher source. Because joy is a spiritual quality, it can arise independent of the worldly circumstances that happen to be present in someone's life at any given moment. And so the songbird of joy is ready to sing within a person who is rich or poor, healthy or ailing, captive or free, as long as it is fed a diet of spiritual seeds.

Who is rich?" asks Ben Zoma,17 and he answers, "One who is content with his lot.

WHAT WE CALL LOVE is actually a deep interweaving of beings. The emotion we feel is actually a marker that the other person or thing has become part of ourselves; we are no longer separate from the other. This explains why losing someone or something we love hurts so much. It is not just "as if" something has been torn from us. When we enter love, a part of ourselves merges with the other and when we lose love, a part of ourselves is torn away.

THE HEBREW WORD for "truth" is composed of the three letters that are the first, middle, and last letters of the Hebrew alphabet. The three Hebrew letters that spell "falsehood" stand next to one another. This tells us that truth creates a firm foundation, like the three legs of a stool, while falsehood is unstable because it stands on a narrow base.

Patience is about responsibility—for your emotional response to situations, and for the situations themselves. Wait—and be saved like a bird from a snare; Hurry, and usher your soul to despair. —YOSEF QIMHI (C. 1160–1235)

IF PEOPLE WOULD only be satisfied with the essentials and if they'd only try to improve everyone else's well-being and share in their common concerns, they'd conquer the world and have more than they ever wanted from it. —RABBI BAHYA IBN PAQUDA (11TH CENTURY)

THE MORE POSSESSIONS, the more worries" (Pirkei Avot 2:7). Do not think that your wealth and property will allow you to live happily and well. On the contrary—you will be caught up in taking care of them all year round. Any intelligent person can tell you that this is so, and any wealthy person can confirm it. —RABBEINU YONAH OF GERONDI (D. 1263)

Compassion is the feeling of empathy which the pain of one being of itself awakens in another; and the higher and more human the beings are, the more keenly attuned are they to re-echo the note of suffering which, like a voice from heaven, penetrates the heart.

THERE ARE FOUR TYPES of temperaments. One who is easily angered and easily appeased—his virtue cancels his flaw. One whom it is difficult to anger and difficult to appease—his flaw cancels his virtue. One whom it is difficult to anger and is easily appeased, is pious. One who is easily angered and is difficult to appease, is wicked. —PIRKEI AVOT 5:11

WHY IS IT THAT when there is ice on the streets, everyone walks slowly and carefully out of fear of slipping physically, while in their daily lives, people are not afraid of slipping spiritually? —RABBI ISSER ZALMAN MELTZER (1870–1953)

WHY DO HUMAN BEINGS have cravings over and above their physical needs? It must be that God implanted these unnecessary cravings in us as a challenge. They give us an opportunity to exercise self-control, which is what enables us to rise to the highest spiritual levels. —RABBI ELIYAHU DESSLER (1892–1953)

A PERSON WHO has gained peace of mind has gained everything. To obtain peace of mind, you need to be at peace with the people in your environment. You need to be at peace with yourself, with your emotions and desires. Furthermore, you need to be at peace with your Creator. —RABBI SHLOMO WOLBE (1914–2005)

When you live with other people and you are content to make a mess in shared spaces, you dishonor the people you live with.

The second stage in Mussar practice involves restraint. Our new awareness calls out for active steps to change the circumstances of our lives. Once we realize how rarely the moments of real silence occur in our days, we can restrain the input and the output of noise that swirls around us. We do have a choice.

ONE'S COMPASSION SHOULD extend to all creatures, and one should neither despise nor destroy them, for the wisdom above extends to all of creation—inanimate objects, plants, animals, and humans. —RABBI MOSHE CORDOVERO (1522–1570)

Occupy a rightful space, neither too much nor too little. Focus neither on your own virtues nor the faults of others.