Quotes from Joan Nestle

I cannot understand a society that is more afraid of a man in a dress than a man in a soldier's uniform.

After a year and a half my therapist retired, so I was bounced to someone else-a woman. Shazam! I suddenly felt I could open up and talk about the real stuff going on in my head. She lasted two session. I guess it was the castration fantasy that pushed over the edge.

We must stand together, realizing the complexity of our histories, both personal and social, choosing when we can tolerate each other's company and when we cannot. We must never pretend to be experts on each other's lives, never belittle the deep differences that do exist or pretend that we do not see the places of exposed pain.

History is not a dead thing or a sure thing. It lived with our choices and our dreams. It is the story of our glories and our sadnesses. It is at different times a lover, an enemy, a teacher, a prophet. It is always a collective memory as complicated and contradictory as people who lived it, but it is always a people's story. Let our tale be marked by our knowledge of what had to be done, and let it shine with the passion of our attempt.

Coalition politics, the building of bridges between disparate groups who share a common vision of how things should be, is a strategy that calls for a tough blend of clarity, compassion, and most of all the willingness to experience someone else's history.

Curiosity is not trivial; it is the respect one life pays to another. It is the largeness of mind and heart that refuses to be bounded by decorum or by desperation. It is the hardest to keep alive in the times it is most needed, the times of hatred, of instability, of attack. Surely these are such times.