Quotes from Jim Butcher

My name is Harry Blackstone Copperfield Dresden. Conjure by it at your own risk.

Woof," said Billy the Werewolf.

You," Madeline said, her voice hollow and wheezing, "are a bad case of herpes, wizard. You're inconvenient, embarrassing, no real threat, and you simply will not go away.

I knew I didn't have much of a chance of getting away from that swarm of fae piranha, but it was an infinitely larger chance than I would have if I stayed in the car and burned to death. Hell's bells, what I wouldn't give to have my shield bracelet. Or my old staff. I didn't even have an umbrella.

Just remember, Harry, I told you this was a bad idea." "Preemptive I-told-you-sos," I said. "Now I've seen everything.

I find it remarkable how often amateurs confuse courage with idiocy.

That's so typical. You won't steal a baby, but you're too lazy to conjugate.

I can't tell you how many jobs I've done without a hitch since the last time I saw you, Dresden. You walk through the door and everything goes to hell." "That's embroidered on my towels, actually," I said.

It is the prerogative of wizards to be grumpy.

But I've noticed that people got the most irrational whenever family was around—while simultaneously losing their ability to distinguish reason from insanity. I call it familial dementia.

She'd grown up in a strict household; she'd gone insane with freedom the minute she ran away and got out on her own.

Death is as light as a feather, duty heavier than a spire.

But even with centuries of experience, I doubted any of them had ever been hit with a water balloon. Or with a holy-water balloon, either.

Dammit, man. I'm a Faerie Princess, not a forensic analyst." I

My cat walked on my face just after dawn.

Not every man in the Senate is some kind of masterful schemer, exerting all his energies to acquire more power and influence at the expense of all others." "No," Isana agreed. "Some of them are incompetent schemers.

I hate that you're here with me," I said. I know. And I'm glad that you're here with me." I know.

Harry," Thomas said, "be real. Everyone wants someone to make us pancakes; we're all just too grown-up to say it.

It's me. Hell's bells, there isn't anything that I can think of that would mimic me looking like this. Even demonic fiends from the nether regions of hell have some taste.

You have a visitor, my lord. I frowned, What? That is why I came in here. You have a visitor waiting for you. I stood up, exasperated. Why didn't you say so? Lacuna looked confused. I did. Just now. You were there. She frowned thoughtfully. Perhaps you have brain damage. It would not shock me in the least, I said. Would you like me to cut open your skull and check, my lord? she asked. Someone that short should not be that disturbing.

Sometimes you don't know the most important things," Tavi said. "You believe them.

Bob," I asked. "What is all my stuff doing here?" "Oh," Bob said. "That. Well. Bianca got the idea, somewhere, that your stuff might explode if anyone messed around with it." I heard the wryness in my voice, though I didn't feel it. "She did, did she." "I can't imagine how." "I'm doubling your pay.

I've always admired your ability to make jokes when faced with adversity.

I did absolutely nothing. Carefully.