Quotes from Christopher Brookmyre

a soulmate of exquisite taste, intellect and wit.

Is it colour?' 'Oh yes.' 'You don't let me down.You are my ambassador to pr0n, man.

twenty-first century communications technology rendering the planet not so much global village as global schoolroom full of sniggering male virgins and bitchy female hypocrites.

Are you comfortable with the fact that somebody just tried to kill you?' 'You'd be surprised,' he told her, grinning. 'There's a rather perverse side of me, to whom that part feels like coming home.' 'I'd heard you have a sick sense of humour. To be honest, I think the word "deranged" really sells it.

The trickiest thing about not killing yourself is knowing that if one day you decide it was a mistake, then you'll always be able to rectify it. Opting against suicide may be a choice for life, but it's not for life.

Some things shape you for the long haul, he reflects, no matter what twists and turns your life may take.

He had the emotional honesty of a Labrador puppy and a reluctance to put on masks out of deference to decorum.

It was said that the dumber an idea was, the more likely its proponent to come forward brandishing a flag and a Bible. This was because the normal political currencies of reason and logic could offer no support.

the wider rings of girth were evidence of health, strength and vitality.

It's that ambient dance pish that Parlabane always hears at trendy gatherings but which no bastard would ever choose to listen to for their own entertainment. The

She's crushed,' McLeod said. 'That's why she came forward. She blames herself for what happened to Anezka.

Mairi stared at Parlabane with an expression he had seen too often down the years: that look of distress at having discovered precisely how deep the rabbit hole goes, and what darkness lay at its end.

They both looked younger than him, as well as taller, better built and undoubtedly more schooled in the noble art of punching fuck out of people. Nonetheless, younger doesn't necessarily mean faster or fitter, and Parlabane was highly schooled in the arguably less noble art of running away.

This was the moment you took your pleasure back to the shop and spent the refund on guilt.

Hey Glasgow, it's Saturday night!' He did it with such rapture, such a sense of celebration that Jane realised she had long ago forgotten why. Saturday night was meaningless when every day was the same, when you were never going to do anything special with it anyway. But this was a stirring reminder of what it used to mean.

Stealing is the worst kind of cheating. It's cheating at life, son. It's for folk that arenae any good at life, so they have to cheat.

The success of Flyaway Holidays was propelled by his uncompromising belief in giving people what they wanted when they travelled abroad, viz: exactly the same things they got at home, but with better weather.

No, you're right. And you said Jan was holding their passports? I'm starting to wonder whether a rock band's tour bus wouldn't be the perfect cover for trafficking girls around Europe.

a big boy did it and ran away

She drove a hundred yards or so at this tentative pace before Nuno calmly reminded her she ought to be on the right.

McGregor had another look at each of the boats, as though he might have failed to notice the first time that one of them was actually fine. They remained consistently jiggered. Short of sticking one of the outboards up his arse, lying on his back and opening his legs, it looked like he was here for the duration.

Christianity's such a weird religion. The image you're brought up with is that eternal suffering awaits anyone who questions God's infinite love. Bill Hicks

Zal wasn't sure whether it would help an uninformed

She claims I've got a habit of finding dangerous situations and effortlessly making them worse.