Quotes from Jules Feiffer

Getting out of bed in the morning is an act of false confidence.

Jesus died to forgive our sins. Dare we make his martyrdom meaningless by not committing them?

Maturity is only a short break in adolescence.

Writing, I explained, was mainly an attempt to out-argue one's past; to present events in such a light that battles lost in life were either won on paper or held to a draw.

At sixteen I was stupid, confused and indecisive. At twenty-five I was wise, self-confident, prepossessing and assertive. At forty-five I am stupid, confused, insecure and indecisive. Who would have supposed that maturity is only a short break in adolescence?

Getting out of bed in the morning is an act of false confidence.

Maturity is only a short break in adolescence.

Artists can color the sky red because they know it's blue. Those of us who aren't artists must color things the way they really are or people might think we're stupid.

At sixteen I was stupid, confused, insecure and indecisive. At twenty-five I was wise, self- confident, prepossessing and assertive. At forty-five I am stupid, confused, insecure and indecisive. Who would have supposed that maturity is only a short break in adolescence?

The big mistake that men make is that when they turn thirteen or fourteen and all of a sudden they've reached puberty, they believe that they like women. Actually, you're just horny. It doesn't mean you like women any more at twenty-one than you did at ten.

Christ died for our sins. Dare we make his martyrdom meaningless by not committing them?

I used to think I was poor. Then they told me I wasn't poor, I was needy. Then they told me it was self-defeating to think of myself as needy, I was deprived. Then they told me underpriviledged was overused, I was disadvantaged. I still don't have a dime, but I have a great vocabulary.

design is so important because chaos is so hard

We want playmates we can own

Satire doesn't stand a chance against reality anymore.

When I was little, I listened to radio serials, read comic books and went to 'B' movies. When I got a little older I listened to big band swing, read slick magazines and went to 'A' movies. When I got even older I listened to F-M stereo, read literary quarterlies and went to foreign movies. And then the pop-culture movement began. Now I listen to old radio serials, read comic books and go to revivals of 'B' movies. In a society without standards who needs to grow up?

Just to show them that I wasn't a lot of hot air I'd say names to them – like "Bellow" and "Malamud" and "Albee" – you know, so they'd begin to trust me.

Wretch. The wretch retches. Calm. Sanity. Sanity is good. Panic is bad. Panic prevented deduction and deduction is the only things that's going to get me out of this.

I learned to distrust writers who talked about how they squeezed the blood onto the typewriter. They just don't want you to know how much fun they have - you'll resent it.

Eventually, if it's on your mind, you stumble on it. You need a certain amount of luck and persistence.

We want playmates we can own.

There's some brain damage, but it may be that very brain damage that allows me to do the work I do.

Good swiping is an art in itself.

Artists can color the sky red because they know it's blue. Those of us who aren't artists must color things the way they really are or people might think we're stupid.