Quotes from David M. Buss

As one researcher noted, "it seems likely that males suffer higher mortality than do females because in the past they have enjoyed higher potential reproductive success, and this has selected for traits that are positively associated with high reproductive success but at a cost of decreased survival" (Trivers, 1985, p. 314).

Nuestros mecanismos de emparejamiento son los fósiles vivientes que nos indican lo que somos y de dónde venimos.

Para alcanzar la armonía y la igualdad, tanto los hombres como las mujeres deben reconocer que están unidos en un proceso coevolutivo que comenzó hace mucho tiempo y que sigue operando en la actualidad a través de nuestras estrategias de emparejamiento.

Both sexes place a tremendous value on intelligence and dependability in a lifetime mate. Both seek long-term mates who are cooperative, trustworthy, and loyal. And both desire mates who will not inflict crushing costs on them. We are all of one species from the same planet. Recognition of our shared psychology and shared biology is one step toward producing harmony between the sexes.

The reason for men's higher mortality, like that of males of many mammalian species, stems directly from their sexual psychology, and in particular from their competition for mates. The use of risky tactics of competition becomes greater as the differences in reproductive outcome become greater.

The average woman is able to attract a far more desirable mate for a short-term sexual encounter than for long-term love, because highly desirable men are willing to consent to sex with a woman of lower mate value as long as the liaison does not come burdened with entangling commitments.

To compound this problem, deception usually occurs in the domains that are most important—status, resources, and commitment for women, appearance and sexual fidelity for men, and personality qualities for both.

Studies that compare men's and women's motives for affairs invariably find that "sex," pure and simple, is a more dominant motive for men. It doesn't necessarily mean they don't love their wives.

As a rule, throughout the animal kingdom, the more polygynous the mating system, the greater the differences between the sexes in terms of mortality. Polygynous mating selects for males who take risks—risks in competing with other males, risks in securing the resources desired by females, and risks in exposing themselves to dangers while pursuing and courting females.

Indeed, cuckolded men are universal objects of disrespect and derision.

Sexual dissatisfaction is linked with marital unhappiness, which is a good predictor of divorce.

Competition among men and selection by women of men high in status and resources are ultimately responsible for the evolution in males of risk-taking traits that lead to successful mating at the expense of a long life.

Because the reproductive stakes are higher for men than for women, more men than women risk being shut out of mating entirely. Men who are mateless for life are more numerous than similarly mateless women in every society.

The cuckold acquires a reputation as easily exploitable once it becomes known that he has been exploited. Women assume that he lacks the ability to prevent other men from encroaching. Perceptions of his desirability on the mating market plummet. All these factors add up to formidable fitness costs of being cuckolded.

This adaptive logic suggests that the greater risk taking—and hence greater death rate—should occur among men who are at the bottom of the mating pool and who therefore risk getting shut out entirely. Men who are unemployed, unmarried, and young are greatly overrepresented in risky activities, ranging from gambling to lethal fights.

In short, men low in desirability, as indicated by being unemployed, unmarried, and young, seem especially prone to risk taking, which sometimes becomes lethal. The point is not that killing per se is necessarily an adaptation but rather that men's evolved sexual psychologies are designed to respond to dire mating conditions by increasing the amount of risk they are willing to take.

Unrequited love is the foundation for fatal attraction.

Many of the behaviors are ordinary tactics of courtship, such as sending flowers, leaving notes, phoning, dropping by. If the overtures are welcome, it's courtship. If they are unwelcome and elicit alarm, they qualify as stalking.

One might think that killing would be a great turnoff to women, but apparently that's not the case.

For women, more economic freedom translates into more sexual freedom.

Young, healthy, and attractive women act on their desires for somewhat older, high-prestige mates, attracting men who might otherwise become mates for older women. Men with status and relative wealth try to fulfill their preferences for youthful, healthy, attractive women.

The qualities of kindness, intelligence, dependability, athleticism, looks, and economic prospects are all present in the same person only rarely. Most of us must settle for someone who has less than the full complement of desirable qualities.

In humans, guarding a bond must last more than days, months, or even years because love can last a lifetime. The dangerous emotion of jealousy evolved to fill this void. Love and jealousy are intertwined passions. They depend on each other and feed on each other.

The more committed partner is generally less desirable. Studies show that the less desirable partner becomes more jealous.