Quotes from Robert Sheckley

Why in God's name should a God be praised if he is only performing his Godly function?

Many reasons had been given, and every man adopted the rationale which suited his own particular emotionality. But what seemed obvious at the time became less so as the years passed. Professors of history argued, experts in economics demurred, psychologists begged to differ, and anthropologists felt it necessary to point out.

Love and war," he said, "are Earth's two staple commodities. We've been turning them both out in bumper crops since the beginning of time.

He learned. The machines taught on deep, unconscious levels. The machines intertwined their lessons with the basic drives, weaving a pattern of learned behavior with the life instinct. They taught, then blocked off conscious knowledge of the lessons, sealed it—and fused it. What had he been taught? For the social good, you must be your own policeman and witness. You must assume responsibility for any crime which might conceivably be yours.

I could probably sit here in my office and do nothing, and the criminal would find his way to me. That's how strong the probabilities are in my favor.

Executive consumption was terribly trying, fantastically wearing. It was proper for a certain kind of man but perhaps he was not that kind.

These two races hunted each other, lived and died for each other, and, through ignorance or guile, ignored any relationship between each other. The relationship was utterly symbiotic, but completely unacknowledged by either race. In fact, each race pretended that it alone was a Civilized Intelligence, and that the other was bestial, contemptible, and of no account. And it now occured to both of themthat they were, in equal measure, participants in the general concept of Humanity.

The ingenious way in which Dennison and his colleagues broke out of their seemingly impregnable prison, using only a steel belt buckle, a tungsten filament, three hens' eggs, and twelve chemicals that can be readily obtained from the human body, is too well known to be repeated here.

Joey, no situation is entirely unworkable. People have gone through worse bad-rapping than that, and come up smelling like roses. The Shaggy Average American Man Story

he'd seen a glistening, caterwheel ground car stopping not far from the doorway.

For a citizen who abides by the law, the law is distant and difficult to find. For those who reject and violate it, the law emerges from its musty sepulchers and goes in search of the transgressor.

Rememberatorium)

Number 402, your name is Will Barrent. Age 27, blood type O-L3, Index JX-221-R. Guilty of murder.

Eh, Mijnheer, querenzie tomar la klopje inmensa de la cabeza vefrouvens in forma de ein skoboldash sundae?

I can!" Marvin said. "And by the Christo malherido, I'm going to!

Wilt snare me with predestination 'round," Margraves quoted, "and then impute my fall to sin?

Garden planners needed for Arcturus! Come and relax among the only vegetable-sentients in the galaxy!

Next Maginnis found him a spacious rent-controlled triplex on Patchin Place for $102.78 a month

C'est insensé Vous avez tout perdu. - Je ne suis pas de votre avis. Permettez-moi de vous faire remarquer que je suis toujours en vie - Je vous l'accorde. Pour le moment.

Sir," the clerk said, "you choose to be disagreeable." "Nasty is the word you were looking for. I've changed my mind about the typewriter. But let me compliment you on your command of English.

Science fiction is very healthy in its form.

But science perhaps is very difficult without faith. Also there is no simple way of saying now we have science, we don't need faith anymore.

A lot of us don't want to be quite that serious about world problems. Our life is there to enjoy, not to be an eternal dissident, eternally unhappy with how things are and with the state of mankind.

As far as the mechanics go, working with other people on received ideas was for me a very interesting technical problem. I can't say that any of my collaborations engaged my heart, but they engaged the craftsman in me.