Quotes from Jen Hatmaker

I bet our kiddos are sturdier than we think. Maybe they don't need every gadget and advantage. Maybe kids grow like all humans do: through struggle, failure, and perseverance. They might have a gear we didn't know about and don't need to be coddled like fragile hothouse plants that can't adapt to new environments. I bet the kids will surprise us.

There is a movement bubbling up that goes beyond cynicism and celebrates a new way of living, a generation that stops complaining about the church it sees and becomes the church it dreams of."[85]

Ignorant intervention is absolutely a contributing factor to cycles of oppression. This

the basic tools that have always produced amazing young adults: hard work, failure, simplicity, gratefulness, restraint and discipline.

We are only qualified to administer mercy, not judgment, because we will pull up many a beautiful stalk of wheat, imagining him a weed.

When Jesus said to "love your neighbor as yourself," I don't think He meant judgmentally; but that is exactly how we treat our own souls, so it bleeds out to others.

If our kids only expect blessings and exemptions, they will be terrible grown-ups. These are not the adults we want to launch, nor are they the Snowflakes we want our kids to marry. We cannot be the mothers-in-law for these people, oh my gosh. If grown-ups expect sandwich dolphins from their spouses, bosses, churches, friends, and children, this will all be a disaster.

Don't be intimidated by successful makers; be inspired by them. Creativity doesn't divide but multiply, finding new expressions in everyone inspired by someone else's gift.

It can be difficult to envision a new start but impossible to deny one.

Guilt is not Jesus' medium. He is battling for global redemption right now; His objective hardly includes huddling in the corner with us, rehashing our shame again. He finished that discussion on the cross. Plus, there's no time for that.

Church must not be the goal of the gospel anymore. Church should not be the focus of our efforts or the banner we hold up to explain what we're about. Church should be what ends up happening as a natural response to people wanting to follow us, be with us, and be like us as we are following the way of Christ. (The Tangible Kingdom by Halt and Smay)

I dream of a church that is once again called great, even by our skeptics, because our works of mercy cannot be denied.

Some useful statements to pocket to create safe spaces for discussion: Tell me more about that. Tell me how your thoughts progressed in this. I appreciate your experience with this. I'm listening. I hear what you are saying. I would love to learn from you. I care about how you feel and your perspective here. I understand that. I identify with

This step is as simple as focusing on the problem at hand, writing down your goals, and then listing action steps and resources needed to accomplish each. (Author's note: I often need a helper to sort this part out. Impartial, strategic thinkers can sometimes see a clear path through what only feels muddy to us. A helping helper to help us think through who can help us and how.

that. What do you think of __________? I hadn't thought of it in that way. Thank you for that angle. Let me think about that a bit before I respond. Thanks for your transparency.

There is a biblical benchmark I now use. We will refer to this criterion for every hard question, big idea, topic, assessment of our own obedience, every "should" or "should not" and "will" or "will not" we ascribe to God, every theological sound bite. Here it is: If it isn't also true for a poor single Christian mom in Haiti, it isn't true.

Kindness. This pulls right to the front. Dad and I have lived half our lives or so, and we've known every type of person. The ones that shine outstanding in our memories are the kind ones. We so deeply want you to be tender toward people. Empathizing is key to a wholehearted life. I pray for your kindness more than

Spoiler alert: You are amazing. You are. This grace thing is no joke. We get to live a free life. So do other people because God gave us Jesus, who fixed everything. Instead of being 'right' at each other all the time, we can just live these beautiful, precious lives of ours in full freedom. It really is good news.

Thank you, Target, for depressing us by stocking your store with adorable jackets, sweaters, and boots in August even though it's still a hundred degrees outside and won't even dip into the seventies until November. This seasonal tragedy is not your fault, but we don't need cute knit legwarmers in September. We still need a swimsuit section. Please download a weather app and send it to your buyers. Sincerely, Every Fall-Loving Texan Crying in Her Tank Top at Halloween.

Until we are all compelled and contributing, we're settling for an anemic faith and a church that robs Christ followers of their vitality and repels the rest of the world.

Thank you, Daylight Savings Time, for making people wax on about the wonder of an extra hour of sleep, only to serve as an especially depressing reminder to parents that kids don't care about farmers and harvests and extra hours of daylight. I enjoy my kids standing at my bedside at 4:30 a.m. like creepy, wide-awake Children of the Corn. Naptimes are also jacked, so there's that. With all due respect-ish, A Tired Mom. Thank you, Obvious

Maybe we can lay down our fear and criticism, self-directed and otherwise. Maybe if we let ourselves off the hook, we can let others off, too, and discover that God was in control all along, just as He tried to tell us. He is good at being God.

cannot say this any plainer: there is no shame in securing counseling, therapy, medication if appropriate, and soul care. Rather, it is the strongest possible response to your own pain. Miles

No one can wound us more than those supposed to nurture: our parents, our spouses, our churches. The chasm between expectation and reality is particularly grim in supposed safe places.