Quotes from Carolyn Hax

Attractions are things we all should be good at saying no to, because our Department of Attraction is arguably the least reliable and productive office in our entire brain.

Sometimes the pain outweighs the good things.

There's nothing like a good family when you're really up a tree.

Relationships are complicated, but happiness in a relationship isn't: It's just wanting exactly what you have. Wanting something else is dispiriting.

Minimizing exposure to miserable people is nothing short of a life strategy.

No matter what else comes, your courage will be your companion for life.

It takes awareness that it's not only not a bad thing to let others do things their own way, it is in fact an improvement. It makes life richer and more interesting.

Being highly invested and preoccupied by an emotionally consuming mission tends to steal resources from other aspects of your emotional life.

If you're not sure what you want, then hold back from making plans or responding to invitations until you have a chance to think about it.

You don't want to be with someone who is already not getting from you what he needs emotionally.

Relationships are complicated, but happiness in a relationship isn't: It's just wanting exactly what you have. Wanting something else is dispiriting.

Being negative is easy. There will always be a downside to everything good, a hurdle to everything desirable, a con to every pro. The real courage is in finding the good in what you have, the opportunities in every hurdle, the pros in every con.

a new baby is not uninterrupted bliss. It's joy mixed with terror, fatigue, depression, intense feelings of helplessness, loneliness and inadequacy. And poop.

Other people's judgements are the mosquitoes of being human.

Trust isn't about having a spotless record and finding someone else who does. It's about finding someone good-hearted enough not to hurt you on purpose, and knowing you'll recover and carry on when pain inevitably comes.

Bodies and minds need breaks or the work suffers, this has been proven and reproven to the point where we don't even need to post links to support it.

It's hard to send your baby off on a plane without you, though that's less reasonable, because sending him off in a car is statistically a bigger risk.

I think a person who arranges the event and orders the food also picks up the check - even the birthday person, even when people at the table insist on paying for the birthday person.

Almost no one can take on an entire future in one step, much less while reeling emotionally.