Quotes from Paula Wall

It seems to me that dealing with little boys is a lot like playing poker. You need to know when to hold them, when to fold them, and when to walk away. But the most important thing you need to know is, oral contraceptives are only 97 percent effective.

If you don't know where you're going, you're never going to get there.

There comes a time in every relationship when as far as a man is concerned everything that needs to be said has been said. Usually we women are too busy talking to ourselves to notice but, when we do figure it out, boy are we mad.

Retirement is like sex. Men love to talk about it but when the time finally comes they're good for about fifteen minutes then they're dying to put their tie back on.

Apparently, what differentiates the mere rich from the filthy rich is a servant who treats you like dirt.

Guys are like dogs. You wish you could take them all home when they're young. But after they've howled all night and slobbered all over everything, you come to realize the ones already trained are much easier to live with.

Women typically go through four developmental stages; 1. Gotta get a man. 2. Gotta get a house. 3. Gotta get a kid. 4. Gotta get a life. Stage four is commonly referred to as the change of life, or the clinical term men-on-pause.

Mom isn't content taking a stroll down memory lane. She's bought a condo and spends half the year there.

Mom recognizes only two sources of wisdom -- the bible and Hallmark.

Politics is like a grandfather clock. The pendulum swings left, the pendulum swings right and every so often a cuckoo pops out.

Boone stood in front of Doc, half naked. Soft black hair ran down his chest, disappearing below his belt. He had arms that made a woman feel light as a scarf, a stomach flat enough to iron on, and an attitude set to smolder.

Oddly, Angela took to school like a bird to flight. She completed her homework almost before the teacher finished assigning it and read twice as many books as required. She had an understanding of history as if she'd lived it. Most surprising, she could stand in front of the classroom and read with the passion and clarity of a little southern Shakespearean thespian.

Old lovers are like socks. They always show up full of static cling and missing their mate.

Just because a woman is good at something doesn't necessarily mean it's what she should do in life. If that were the case most of the women in the Belle family would be hookers.

You get prettier every day, don't you?" Red said, as he spun the stool. No one called Angela's little girl by her real name. No one could spit it out. Angela had found the name in the family Bible. Apparently, it wanted to stay there. "She's cute as a Dixie cup," Willie said from the service window. "Are you my little Dixie cup?" Red asked, giving her nose a tap. Clapping her hands, the child giggled and squealed. And just like that, Aubrette Orianna Belle was christened Dixie.