Quotes from Shalom Auslander

I moved a pillow aside... preferring the joyful company of the delusional to the miserable company of the sane.

He could pull this off. He was sure of it. It would have been one thing to protect Anne Frank from the Nazis; he was pretty sure he couldn't have managed that. But protecting his family from Anne Frank? How difficult could that be?

Kugel set off, the wind in what would have been, some years ago, his hair.

Let him be floored, O Lord, thought Kugel. Let him be stunned. Let him be flabber-fucking-gasted.

Expecting hell, we're ill prepared for heaven.

I spent the best years of my life atoning for something I didn't do, something my parents didn't do, something done just about before I was ever even born. I got no complaints with that, but I'm about all atoned out, and I ain't yet gotten round to atoning for the things I did do.

SOLOMON KUGEL His performance, of late, had been subpar. Born, unfortunately. Died eventually.

Stop expecting more from us than we can possibly provide, and you'll stop being so disappointed.

his hope was that she would finish her damn book quietly and just leave; that one morning he would awaken and go up to the attic, and Anne Frank would be gone, and he could go on with his life, Anne-free. One hundred percent Frankless. Now with Less Genocide.

Just move the train, for fuck's sake, she's not getting any deader.

Remember your grandfather's last words, Jonah would tell his children: Life is nothing more than a little why.

Anger and depression are not diseases or dysfunctions or anomalies; they are perfectly rational responses to the myriad avoidable disappointments that begin in a thoroughly irrational hope.