Quotes from Allison Bottke

Clearly, Boundary Setting 101 is not typically a part of a child's education. If anything, most of us have been conditioned to not set boundaries as a way to avoid the negative reactions of others. The ability to set boundaries to take care of yourself begins with the belief that your "self" is worth caring for.

For years some of us have focused our attention (and worries) on our adult children. We've not only taken on the role of director in the drama of their lives, but the roles of producer, stage manager, dresser, caterer, financier, and scriptwriter as well. We've done countless things for them that they are more than capable of doing for themselves.

This show is over. But a new production is on the horizon! We must replace our enabling behavior with something else. Ending Enabling Behavior From experience I've learned four life-saving truths about changing enabling behavior: We can pray for the power to change ourselves. We can help (not enable) adult children of any age develop wings to fly on their own. We can find comfort in knowing we are not alone

Yet we're so weary of living with the ongoing crisis that we return to the same behaviors and habits—and our adult children have us pegged.

They know what to expect from us. They know that eventually we will "help" them yet again. The bitter truth for many of us is that we haven't been helping; we've been enabling. So instead of praying to God to stop the pain, remove the difficulty, or change the lives of our adult children, we must rise up and pray for something entirely different. We must pray for the courage to look deep in our own hearts and souls. We must pray for the strength to

To every parent or grandparent with an aching heart. "With God all things are possible." MATTHEW 19:26

We can't control the way others treat us, but this book will show you how to tell them, in a positive and productive manner, how you feel about being treated poorly. Even more important, it will bring you closer to the God who wants nothing more than to hold you in the palm of His hand and love and protect you regardless of your circumstances.