Quotes About Boundaries

El problema es que, si no dejas que nadie pase al otro lado del muro por miedo a que resulte un enemigo, también terminas por dejar fuera a los amigos.

problema es que, si no dejas que nadie pase al otro lado del muro por miedo a que resulte un enemigo, también terminas por dejar fuera a los amigos.

Every man must define his identity against his mother. If he does not, he just falls back into her and is swallowed up.

Know the hazards of lending and borrowing with friends.

No dates until you're sixteen. And no boyfriends, either.' I'm not quite sure how to tell Mom, but it looks like I don't just have one boyfriend. I have two.

Uniqueness and limitation are synonymous

Declining to hear "no" is a signal that someone is either seeking control or refusing to relinquish it. With strangers, even those with the best intentions, never, ever relent on the issue of "no," because it sets the stage for more efforts to control. If you let someone talk you out of the word "no," you might as well wear a sign that reads, "You are in charge.

Safety is the preeminent concern of all creatures and it clearly justifies a seemingly abrupt and rejecting response from time to time. Anyway, rudeness is relative.

The next signal I explain to Kelly is one I call loan-sharking: "He wanted to be allowed to help you because that would place you in his debt, and the fact that you owe a person something makes it hard to ask him to leave you alone.

If you let someone talk you out of the word "no," you might as well wear a sign that reads, "You are in charge.

The worst response when someone fails to accept "no" is to give ever-weakening refusals and then give in.

I suggest that women never explain why they don't want a relationship but simply make clear that they have thought it over, that this is their decision, and that they expect the man to respect it. Why would a woman explain intimate aspects of her life, plans, and romantic choices to someone she doesn't want a relationship with?

Forced teaming is an effective way to establish premature trust because a we're-in-the-same-boat attitude is hard to rebuff without feeling rude. Sharing a predicament, like being stuck in a stalled elevator or arriving simultaneously at a just-closed store will understandably move people around social boundaries. But forced teaming is not about coincidence; it is intentional and directed, and it is one of the most sophisticated manipulations.

the simple defense for forced teaming, which is to make a clear refusal to accept the concept of partnership: "I did not ask for your help and I do not want it.

I encourage people to remember that "no" is a complete sentence.

No" is a word that must never be negotiated, because the person who chooses not to hear it is trying to control you.

If you tell someone ten times that you don't want to talk to him, you are talking to them—nine more times than you wanted to.

Usually when I feel like there's no time, it really means I haven't made time for myself.

One way to hold a woman is not to hold her.

P)eople's good intentions can wind up putting us in boxes as confining as coffins.

I'd actually rather go off with my family. This is another thing you don't advertise about yourself,

It's just that we'd like to think that craziness and sanity are on opposite ends of an ocean, but really they're more like neighboring islands.

I think I'm a little wigged out that I've been more intimate with your dad than I have with you.

Tell not thy previous loves to a woman, lest she also telleth thee hers.