Quotes About Listening

What was the point of a little voice? Weren't voices for being heard?

You should try not to talk so much, friend. You'll sound far less stupid that way. - Breeze

People often silence themselves, or "agree to disagree" without fully exploring the actual nature of the disagreement, for the sake of protecting a relationship and maintaining connection. But when we avoid certain conversations, and never fully learn how the other person feels about all of the issues, we sometimes end up making assumptions that not only perpetuate but deepen misunderstandings, and that can generate resentment.

This is one reason we need to dispel the myth that empathy is "walking in someone else's shoes." Rather than walking in your shoes, I need to learn how to listen to the story you tell about what it's like in your shoes and believe you even when it doesn't match my experiences.

It turns out that trust is in fact earned in the smallest of moments. It is earned not through heroic deeds, or even highly visible actions, but through paying attention, listening, and gestures of genuine care and connection.

Empathy is a strange and powerful thing. There is no script. There is no right way or wrong way to do it. It's simply listening, holding space, withholding judgment, emotionally connecting, and communicating that incredibly healing message of "You're not alone.

Empathy is not relating to an experience, it's connecting to what someone is feeling about an experience.

We're going to need to intentionally be with people who are different than us. We're going to have to sign up, join, and take a seat at the table. We're going to have to learn how to listen, have hard conversations, look for joy, share pain, and be more curious than defensive, all while seeking moments of togetherness.

Courage gives us a voice and compassion gives us an ear. Without both, there is no opportunity for empathy and connection.

If I share something with you that's difficult for me, I'd rather you say, "I don't even know what to say right now, I'm just so glad you told me." Because in truth, a response can rarely make something better. Connection is what heals.

A brave leader is someone who says I see you. I hear you. I don't have all the answers, but I'm going to keep listening and asking questions.

The best story stewardship in these moments is just to say, "I'm grateful that you're sharing this with me. What does support look like? I can listen and be with you, I can help problem-solve, or whatever else you need. You tell me.

I'm brave enough to listen. I don't have to take it all in or add it to my load, but I'm brave enough to listen.

We have to listen to understand in the same way we want to be understood.

The "Okay, I get it and I'll work on it" is a common shut-down technique. I took a deep breath and leaned into the mother of all rumble tools—curiosity. "Tell me more about how this plays out for y'all. I want to understand.

Empathy is a strange and powerful thing. There is no script. There is no right way or wrong way to do it. It's simply listening, holding space, withholding judgement, emotionally connecting, and communicating that incredibly healing message of "you're not alone.

I gave him a nervous smile and said "Say more." Another favorite rumble tool. Asking someone to "say more" often leads to profoundly deeper and more productive rumbling. Context and details matter. Peel the onion. Stephen Covey's sage advice still stands: "Seek first to understand, then to be understood.

Harriet Lerner teaches, to listen with the same passion with which we want to be heard.

Everyone seems to know too little and say too much.

We have to be able to talk about how we feel, what we need and desire, and we have to be able to listen with an open heart and an open mind. There is no intimacy without vulnerability. Yet another powerful example of vulnerability as courage.

When receiving feedback, we can identify a value-supporting behavior or a piece of self-talk to help in the moment. Here's mine: When I'm receiving feedback, and I want to stay aligned with my value of courage, I say to myself, "I'm brave enough to listen.

Another thing I repeat to myself, particularly when I'm sitting across from, or with, someone who does not have great feedback delivery skills, is "There's something valuable here, there's something valuable here.

It is earned not through heroic deeds, or even highly visible actions, but through paying attention, listening, and gestures of genuine care and connection.

The ultimate goal in receiving feedback: a skillful blend of listening, integrating feedback, and reflecting it back with accountability.