Quotes About Mother-in-law

Adam was the luckiest of men; he had no mother-in-law.

My mother-in-law speaks not a word of English. I speak not a word of Tajiki. So I smile at her ingratiatingly and she fixes me with a beady eye.

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law.

The only woman a wife should ever be jealous of is her husband's mom.

Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.

Behind every successful man is a proud wife and a surprised mother-in-law.

My mother-in-law broke up my marriage. My wife came home from work one day and found me in bed with her.

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was amazed; I never knew they worked.

The mother-in-law came round last week. It was absolutely pouring down. So I opened the door and I saw her there and I said, 'Mother, don't just stand there in the rain. Go home.'

I've just had some bad news. Tomorrow is the mother in law's funeral. And she's cancelled it.

What can you say about a man, who on Mother's Day sends flowers to his mother-in-law, with a note thanking her for making him the happiest man on Earth?

The wife's Mother said, 'When you're dead, I'll dance in your grave.' I said: 'Good, I'm being buried at sea'.

Have I got a mother-in-law. She's so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock.

They say the definition of ambivalence is watching your mother-in-law drive over a cliff in your new Cadillac.

I should, many a good day, have blown my brains out, but for the recollection that it would have given pleasure to my mother-in-law.

My mother-in-law was so mean she blinded herself just to get a free dog.

I took my mother-in-law to Madame Tussaud's Chamber of Horrors, and one of the attendants said: 'Keep her moving sir; we're stock-taking.'

Pakistan is the sort of place every man should send his mother-in-law, for a month, with all expenses paid.

Yet you would not drive a car with your mouth unless you are my mother-in-law.

Behind every successful person, stands a very successful mother-in-law.

My mother-in-law's so fat that when she passes her handbag from hand to hand she throws it.

My mother-in-law had to stop skipping for exercise. It registered seven on the Richter scale.

My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind.

Maybe I shouldn't mouth off to the elemental I kinda hoped was my future mother-in-law.