Quotes About Mindset

This idea—that belonging needs to be continually refreshed and reinforced—is worth dwelling on for a moment. If our brains processed safety logically, we would not need this steady reminding.

But the message from Dweck and the hotbeds is clear: high motivation is not the kind of language that ignites people. What works is precisely the opposite: not reaching up but reaching down, speaking to the ground-level effort, affirming the struggle. Dweck's research shows that phrases like "Wow, you really tried hard," or "Good job, dude," motivate far better than what she calls empty praise.

My job is to architect the greenhouse. This is a useful insight into how Hsieh creates belonging because it implies a process. "I probably say the word collision a thousand times a day," Hsieh says. "I'm doing this because the point isn't just about counting them but about making a mindset shift that they're what matters. When an idea becomes part of a language, it becomes part of the default way of thinking.

Expect nothing and you'll always be surprised

happiness is about 40 percent genetic (you inherit it from your ancestors), 10 percent your situation in life or what happens to you, and 50 percent habits and mindset.

You will increase your happiness if you scrap or reduce any unrealistic expectations. Chances are you're not going to have the perfect career, the perfect spouse, or the perfect kids. In fact, seeking perfection is a recipe for unhappiness because you will always be disappointed. Set expectations that make sense to the current situation you find yourself in. And match those expectations with what you've learned about yourself through a strengths-based assessment.

Consistent happiness is about making the right decisions again and again over time, which builds the neural pathways of feeling good.

Make an effort to compare yourself to others in a positive way. Comparing yourself to others in a negative way is the most predictable way to lower your self-esteem.

Lie #2: A "Don't Worry, Be Happy" mindset, promoted by the popular 1988 Grammy Song of the Year of the same name by Bobby McFerrin, will make you happy.

correctly reprogramming the brain is more than reminding yourself to think happy thoughts. I prefer that you adopt a mindset of "accurate thinking" with a positive or optimistic can-do spin to stay in the right frame of mind—happy. However, that's not easy to do because the default setting on the brain—set back in prehistoric times—is negativity.

Pollyanna's philosophy about finding something to be glad about in any situation is an excellent way to go through life. If there were ever a good time to play the Glad Game, then today would undoubtedly qualify. But no matter what situation or setback you find yourself in, I urge you to ask yourself this question: What is there to be glad about?

What is the conceptual tie that binds anxiety and planning? Both, of course, are intimately connected to thinking about the future.

Our desire to control is so powerful, and the feeling of being in control so rewarding, that people often act as though they can control the uncontrollable.

not thinking about the future is much more challenging than being a psychology professor.

We cannot feel good about an imaginary future when we are busy feeling bad about an actual present.

Human beings are works in progress that mistakenly think they're finished.

The things we do when we expect our lives to continue are naturally and properly different than the things we might do if we expected them to end abruptly. We go easy on the lard and tobacco, smile dutifully at yet another of our supervisor's witless jokes, read books like this one when we could be wearing paper hats and eating pistachio macaroons in the bathtub, and we do each of these things in the charitable service of the people we will soon become.

People's beliefs about their abilities have a profound effect on those abilities. Ability is not a fixed property; there is a huge variability in how you perform. People who have a sense of self-efficacy bounce back from failures; they approach things in terms of how to handle them rather than worrying about what can go wrong.

When frustration is unchecked, Sam, it turns into rage, and rage triggers action.

Once we realize that the boundaries between work and play are artificial, we can take matters in hand and begin the difficult task of making life more livable.

maybe those decisions were bad because he made them in the afternoon

are we wired to be passive and inert? Or are we wired to be active and engaged?

Fully detached beats semidetached.

But the truth is different. You're much more likely to have a Silver Emma moment than a Bronze Borghini one. When researchers have tracked people's thoughts by asking them to keep daily diaries or by pinging them randomly to ask what's on their mind, they've discovered that If Onlys outnumber At Leasts in people's lives—often by a wide margin.[7] One study found that 80 percent of the counterfactuals people generate are If Onlys.