Quotes About Influence

In order to influence a child, one must be careful not to be that child's parent or grandparent.

One doesn't have a sense of humor. It has you.

If Jesus had known that his image would end up on Justin Bieber's calf, he would've never started Christianity.

I think the reason Jesus is so popular, just on a celebrity level, is that he died at the peak of his career.

Up to now, America has not been a good milieu for the rise of a mass movement. What starts out here as a mass movement ends up as a racket, a cult, or a corporation.

We have a president for whom English is a second language. He's like 'We have to get rid of dictators,' but he's pretty much one himself.

I believe you are one of the people that can lift the corners of the universe.

The one and only thing over which you have complete and total control is how you focus your own mind. Luckily, this determines everything else.

You don't ever ask a barber whether you need a haircut.

You have the Midas touch. Everything you touch turns to a muffler.

If Lincoln were alive today, he'd be turning over in his grave.

If words had weight, a single sentence from Death would have anchored a ship.

Every comic went through their Mitch Hedberg phase - the glasses, the hair in the face - and you knew immediately when they were doing it.

Television is the triumph of machine over people.

Sometimes, a word succeeds beyond the wildest dreams of its creators, like a virus sent into the world to infect common speech.

If you can't win by reason, go for volume.

I'm told I'm very charming when people do what I want.

You have to have funny faces and words, you can't just have words. It is a powerful thing, and I think that's why it's hard for people to imagine that women can do that, be that powerful.

Should I really care what kind of beer frogs recommend?

Arouse in the other person an eager want.

They're working their way down. Next year, Todd Bridges gets the award. When I was a kid I wanted to be Eddie Murphy and now I'm a rip-off of Eddie Murphy.

[W]ithout humour you cannot run a sweetie-shop, let alone a nation.

Elected office holds more perks than Elvis' nightstand.

I get my sense of humor from my parents. That's why they don't have one anymore.