Quotes About Parenting

Parents almost always want what's best for their children. They just don't always know what that is.

One time I saw a tiny Joshua tree sapling growing not too far from the old tree. I wanted to dig it up and replant it near our house. I told Mom that I would protect it from the wind and water it every day so that it could grow nice and tall and straight. Mom frowned at me. "You'd be destroying what makes it special," she said. "It's the Joshua tree's struggle that gives it its beauty.

Mom always said people worried too much about their children. Suffering when you're young is good for you, she said. It immunized your body and your soul, and that was why she ignored us kids when we cried. Fussing over children who cry only encouraged them, she told us. That's positive reinforcement for negative behavior.

My guess is my brother would call his mom and his dad pretty regularly, a lot more than I probably did.

Emma, okay, enough with the singing. Mommy's getting a three-pill headache.

Emma, okay, enough with the singing. Mommy's getting a three-pill headache.

Mrs. Lambchop sighed and shook her head. "You're at the office all day, having fun," she said. "You don't realize what I go through with the boys. They're very difficult." Kids are like that," Mr. Lambchop said. "Phases. Be patient, dear.

You have got to change those diapers every day. When it says "six to twelve pounds" on the side of the Pampers box, they're not lying. That is all those things will hold.

If you pull at babies too hard, they'll spew like a can of beer. I used to shake up my daughter and hand her to people I didn't like. "Hold her just a minute, would ya?"

My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.

Part of my growing up was always trying to make my parents proud and always trying to keep them happy. I think part of what held them together was my involvement in sports.

Deeper in their hearts, they were debating what kind of man they wanted their son to be.

For the record, I think it should be illegal for a boy to have to fold his mother's underwear.

Loded Diaper

Mom is always saying I'm a smart kid, but that I just don't apply myself.

He got the crib, so for the first few months of my life I had to sleep in the top dresser drawer, which I'm pretty sure isn't even legal.

I've realized is that every time you get something cool for your birthday or for Christmas, within a week it's being used against you. (We'll be taking this away until your English grade improves)

That made Dad pretty mad, so he said "NO SON OF MINE IS A QUITTER!" Which isn't really true at all. I'm a HUGE quitter, and so is Rodrick. And I think Manny is on his third of fourth preschool by now.

With children it is often so much easier to take the path of least resistance—to let them eat that fast food they love rather than cook something healthy, to let them watch TV rather than read to them, to let them play video games rather than interact with them.

I'd forced books on my kids from the day they were born and, as it turned out, it had been completely unnecessary because all of them liked to read. Or maybe they liked to read because I'd read aloud nearly every children's book in print.

Naming our kid was a real trial. I seize up when I have to name a document on my computer. I didn't name my son after me. What if he turns into a maniac? How'd you like to be Jeffrey Dahmer, Senior?

Gotta kill the monster before you bring a kid into the world.

Argh? Pathetic and inarticulate. Nice combination. Your mothers must be so proud.

Without parental grounding, she lacks the help she requires to process her intense emotional responses or the distorted versions of her idealized self. Stalled on the threshold of selfhood, the psyche of the child becomes increasingly preoccupied with her external self.