Quotes About Parenting

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.

No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I'm not talking about the kids.

Parents are not interested in justice; they are interested in quiet.

A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.

We're not raising children with the love that we need to.

In spite of the six thousand manuals on child raising in the bookstores, child raising is still a dark continent and no one really knows anything. You just need a lot of love and luck — and, of course, courage.

Even though your kids will consistently do the exact opposite of what you're telling them to do, you have to keep loving them just as much.

No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I'm not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.

Parents are not quite interested injustice, they are interested in quiet.

Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.

No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I'm not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.

I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.

A grandchild is God's reward for raising a child.

I brought you in this world, and I can take you out!

In spite of the seven thousand books of expert advice, the right way to disciplne a child is still a mystery to most fathers and...mothers Only your grandmother and Genghis Khan know how to do it.

From my daughters, however, I have learned what every parent knows of himself—that I do not know how to raise children.

When did mediocrity and banality become a good image for your children?

Delayed gratification is important first and foremost in training children.

I would never encourage my children to be athletes - first because my children are not athletes and second because there are so many people pushing to get to the top in sports that 100 people are crushed for each one who breaks through. This is unfortunate.

Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex.

Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex.

TV was like a third parent- a source of ideas and information and impressions. and not such a bad parent- always with time to spare, always eager to please, often funny.

The Best Way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30% of their ice cream.